A Helluva Time - Diablo_D

Chapter 1 Chapter Text

Name: Izuku Midoriya

Age: 22

Sex: Male

Sexuality: Bisexual

Quirk: [REDACTED]

Powers: Pyrokinesis, Flight, Demon Transformation, Telekinesis

Status: Overlord

Looks:

Overlord Outfit:

Demonic Form:

Likes: His partners, the Happy(Hazbin) Hotel, his kids, I.M.P. (minus Blitz on some occasions), apple pie, frappuccinos, musicals, some overlords

Dislikes: Most of the overlords, turf wars, assholes, being disrespected, Angel Dust being a pervert, when his partners gets hurt.

Personality: Respectful (when respected), menacing (when not respected), calculating, understanding, flirtatious (too his partners)

Harem:

(I really wanted to add Millie but didn't want to break the couple up nor did I want to genderbend Moxxie. So yeah I'm doing this. If you don't like it you know where the exit it.)

(She's still with Tex, he's just not with Izuku. Lets just say she gets wild and Izuku is one of the very few people capable of keeping up with her.)

(Nothing lewd will happen. She's too pure. Don't worry. But they are gonna get really close when "Welcome to Heaven" roles around.)

(They have a history together that I will not spoil but it should cause a bit f drama.)

Kids:

(Her name is still gonna be Tilla despite the comics story line.)

(Note: This is NOT Loona's child. Her name is Akane, because of the eyes, and she was adopted by Izuku when she was an infant pup. Will be explained more later in the story.)

(I couldn't give Izuku kids and NOT include Eri. And yes, she is a sinner demon that was sent to Hell for the 'killing' of her biological father. Heaven in the HH/HB universe is very likely corrupted in some way. More will be explained later down the line.)

If you've read my sample of this sample of this story in my "Random Sh*t" story ideas then you'll have a general direction of this story. If not I recommend reading it. I might add more to the harem if you all want me too but I might not. Depends how I'm feeling about it.

If you have requests on additions to the harem feel free to make them. Some characters are off the table, some for obvious reasons and others being that I already have plans for. Such as Crimson, Striker, Blitz, Stolas, Asmodeus, Fizzarolli, Mammon, Valentino, Vox, etc. Octavia is on the fence since I already have Stella (I know plenty of other authors have done so but chill.)

And feel free to put in a scenario for your requested character(s). I might not use it if it won't mesh will with my plans but I'd still like to read them.

Also, as a minor forewarning, Deku is gonna lots and lots of ~TRAUMA~, because it wouldn't be right to put him here and have it not be.

Chapter 2: Hazbin Hotel Pilot

Chapter Text

At the end of the rainbow there's happiness

And to find it, how often I tried

But my life is a race

Just a wild goose chase

And my dreams have all been denied

Why have I always been a failure

What can the reason be

I wonder if the world's to blame

I wonder if it could be me

A land dyed in red appeared seemingly after a great battle had taken place. An enormous red pentagram glowed ominously in the sky. Large signs and graffiti were strewn about the streets. Saying things like "f*ck you heaven!", "Your days are numbered!" and "Punishment!". Not a single living soul was left in the open streets. Just rows upon rows of mangle and dismembered corpses.

I'm always chasing rainbows

Watching clouds drifting by

My schemes are just like all my dreams

Ending in the sky

Out of the tallest room in the highest building walked out a young woman with long blonde hair wearing a pink suit. Tears streamed down her face as she leaned against the rails on the balcony. A small spark erupted from her fingertips before she launched it into the sky. Exploding into fireworks to signal the survivors that the new year has begun.

One by one the citizens of the city had opened up their windows and exited their homes. Not even batting an eye to the destruction and death that had befallen them. As this has happened to them many times before.

Some fellows look and find the sunshine

I always look and find the rain

Some fellows make a winning sometime

I never even make a gain,

believe me

Several figures made their way to start the day. A trio of individuals open the curtains of the p*rn studio, simply labeled as "p*rn Studio". The young girl in the group opens up her phone to take a selfie with a man with a flat-screen T.V. for a head that was seated beside her. Meanwhile a tall moth pimp man clad in red grunts and scowls as he looked at a text he had gotten from an employee.

Elsewhere, a very poshly dressed woman watches with a smile as several of her underlings begin to gorge themselves on fresh meat. Meanwhile, she simply crosses the name "Franklin" off of her sign that once said "Franklin and Rosie's Emporium."

The blonde woman continues to cry as she sings her sorrows. Her eyes turned a blood red as she stared in the distance at the clock tower. The clock resetting from 0 to 365, starting the countdown to the next cleanse.

I'm always chasing rainbows

Waiting to find a little bluebird

In vain

She continued to cry for a few moments as another figure walked out from behind her. The male figure had seemed to be on a phone call a moment ago as he hung up to go over to the woman. As soon as he was behind her he gently wrapped his arms around her to bring her into a hug.

"It's gonna be alright, Charlie." He said calmly, placing a small kiss to her forehead in a comforting manner. "Soon enough all this is gonna change."

"I-Izuku..." She muttered out as she turned to face him. He smiled softly as he brushed away her tears. "I-its j-just....How can we be sure? I-I still don't have proof it'll work. And everything Dad said it's all..."

"It's gonna be fine. Listen to me when I say that I have faith in you." He smiled as he kissed her again, holding her close as she snuggled in his chest. "I know that demons can change if they try hard enough. After all, you helped me see that. Remember?"

"But not all of them will want to. What if they try and nothing comes out of it? What if it really is impossible?!" She breathed heavily as he petted her gently.

"While it's true that we have no proof it'll work, no one has any that says it won't either?" He told her as they separated. "And that's more than enough reason for me." He said with determination. "And we'll be with you every step of the way. No matter what. Just like you were there for me."

"Thanks, Izu." Charlie smiled as she reached up and kissed his cheek. "You really know how to cheer me up."

"Of course, Apple Pie." He said smugly, getting a giggle from her. "Now let's go get you some fritters and your favorite frappuccino. I got everything made ready to go. We have a really big day ahead of us."

"You know we could've just gotten some on the way, you didn't need to trouble yourself making them."

"Nonsense! Nothing but the very best in all of Hell for any of my sweethearts." He proclaimed as he took her hand in his. "Besides, it's calming and makes it all worth it to see you smile." She let out a giggle as he nuzzled against her cheek.

"Okay, okay! I get it!" She laughed as she hugged his arm. "I guess we better get going before Vaggie starts getting worried."

They walked for a few minutes before meeting up with their shared partner Vagatha, more commonly known as Vaggie. A slim demon with muted gray-lavender colored skin. Her hair is white and has a jagged, moth-like shape to the cut, with gray-lavender stripes at the ends. Her left eye is replaced by a dark reddish-pink X on a slate-gray eye-patch.

"Hey there, hun." She said as she approached the two carrying a couple coffees in her hands. "Are you ready for this?" She asked as she handed her girlfriend her frappuccino.

"Yeah. Lets just hope it all goes well."

"You'll do fine." She smiled as she placed a kiss on her cheek.

"Hey! What about me?" Izuku asked in fake sadness, making the moth themed girl roll her eyes before giving him one as well. "Now all's right with the world." The two girls chuckled at his actions.

"Okay, but we should really get going before the mayhem starts." Vaggie said seriously, right on cue an explosion could be heard off in the distance. "Never mind." She groaned in annoyance.

"No need to fret, Sweetie. I have us covered." Izuku said as he took her hand in a comforting manner. Placing a quick kiss to it before they began leaving.

"Razzle! Dazzle! We're heading out, come on you little tikes!" Charlie called out as two goat-like creatures flew into view and took some of the belongings out to the awaiting limo.

~Some Time Later~

Static ensued as the screen to a television set was turned on. The logo for Hell's very own "666 News" appeared before dissolving to show off two reporters. One a very tall pale woman with a large head wearing a red dress. The other a slightly shorter male wearing a suit whose face seemed to be that of a gas mask. Or maybe that was just a mask to hide his face. I don't know. I don't care either. Where was I?

"Good afternoon all you wretched lucky survivors, I'm you host Katie Killjoy." The woman introduced herself with a wide smile.

"And I'm Tom Trench." The male said as a small video began playing beside him. "Chaos ensues as a turf war has broken out on the West side of Pentagram City. The two notable players today happen to be the kingpin Sir Pentious and the self proclaimed 'spunky powerhouse' Cherri Bomb."

As he spoke the small screen showed off a picture of a serpentine man posing for a picture wearing a 'music band' t-shirt under his suit and carrying a skateboard as his hat looked really uncomfortable. Then it transitioned to what seemed to be a hand drawn picture of a young cyclops woman with long pink hair flipping the bird.

"After the recent extermination many areas are now up for grabs." Katie said as she made a clawing motion with her hands. "And now demons all over Hell are duking it out for new territory."

As she said this, a fight between both mentioned demons was shown. Pentious was attempting to fire a bazooka as Cherri flung an egg demon at him before he could. In retaliation he threw his henchman back at her only for Cherri to crack him open over her knee. Giving her a chance to slip one of her signature bombs into the shells before she threw it back at him. An explosion hitting him at point blank.

"Those two are really starting to have at it."

"Those two are fitting tooth and nail for that hot spot." Katie said as she pulled out a tooth and a nail out of her coffee mug. Which she then proceeded to eat.

"And I'd sure like to nail her hot spot! Woo-Hoo!" Tom wiggled his brow as he stared at the footage of Cherri being Cherri.

"You sure are a limp dick jackass, Tom. Or should I say-" She says as she pours her scalding hot coffee onto the poor bastard's crotch. "No dick."

"Not again." Tom whimpered in pain as Katie let out a small cackle.

"Cumming up next we have an exclusive interview with the daughter of Hell's own head honcho. Who's here to discuss her brand new passion project." She says as a picture of Charlie is shown with her title of 'Princess of Hell.' Soon transitioning to a picture of Izuku, who was shirtless and showing off his glistening manly abs, pitch black wings and surrounded by raging blue flames. "And accompanying her is her fiance and potential future King of Hell, Izuku Midoriya. Most known for being voted Number 4 in the Top Ten Sexiest Men in Hell by Hellborn and sinners alike. All that and more, after the break!" She says as she shattered her coffee mug with a strangled smile.

"Suck it up you little Bi-" She yells at Tom who was still whimpering but was cut off as the feed was cut for the commercial break.

"Did she have to introduce me like that?" Izuku sighed heavily as Razzle handed him a donut and coffee from the concession table. "Thanks." He patted the little man's head as he went back to his business.

"I told you doing that pageant was a bad idea." Vaggie said as she helped straighten his outfit.

"Hey, you gotta admit the prize money was too good to pass up. Still wished I didn't have to put up with all the weirdos."'Especially with all the sh*t I had to go through to get Valentino off my back.'He growled softly at the memory. "But either way we got some extra revenue for the project."

"We would've been fine. I told you I had saved enough over the years to get everything up and running." Charlie said with a small pout, complaining about how they couldn't go out for a date without disguises any more.

"Charlie, I love you more than literally anything in Heaven, Earth and Hell, but that building is quite literally falling apart." Izuku deadpanned slightly while she turned away awkwardly. "And I am willing to do almost anything to make sure your dream happens."

"It just sucks is all." She muttered with a pout. "And the fact that damnShiroi hane no meinugot a hold you just grinds my gears."

"Damn, you're getting really good with Japanese." He chuckled as he grabbed hold of her hand. "Don't worry she's chilled out quite a bit. It's her brother that I really have a problem with but that's besides the point. Not to mention she helps pay for stuff around the hotel."

"I know, I know."

"C'mere." He said as he dragged her over and planted a kiss on her lips. Surprising her at first but she eventually melted into it. After a few seconds they separated, smirking happily as Charlie's face flushed red but she smiled all the same.

"You jerk." She giggled as she wrapped her arms around him for another peck.

"I know, but I'm your jerk." He smiled before quickly bringing Vaggie into the hug. "And yours too." He smirked as he proceeded to do the same to her. The short moth demon girl is not even trying to refuse.

"Eres dulce y sexy hijo de puta." Vaggie muttered under her breath after they separated. The three happy lovers laughed sweetly as some of the onlookers either cooed or gagged at the wholesome sight.

"Now, do you remember what to say?" She asked as she adjusted Charlie's bowtie.

"Yes! Let's do this!" She says now filled with determination.

"Just look at me and I'll mouth it to you. Or just follow Izuku's lead."

"Solid advice, Vags. Solid advice." He said sarcastically with a chuckle.

"Come on! I know what to say!" She whines slightly as she walks over to the snack. "I just feel like we should do something to make it all sound more exciting." She tossed a donut aside before stars appeared in her eyes. "Oooooh~ How about I-"

"Sing a song about?" Vaggie and Izuku said simultaneously with an amused smile on their faces.

"Aw~ You knew I was gonna say that~" She cooed as she booped their snoots playfully.

"Because we know you, Apple Pie."

"And please don't sing, hun. This is serious."

"I know but I'm better at expressing myself and my goals through song!" She said in excitement as she got onto the snack table. Razzle and Dazzle simply munching on some food as she did so.

"I'm pretty sure you just stepped in someone's potato salad." Izuku commented, making Charlie grimace as she kicked it away.

"Life isn't a musical, sweetheart."

"Tell that to Vivienne Medrano, aka Vivziepop. Who writes a musical number for pretty much every character in her shows."

"Okay fine. But I got a lot of other ideas. The highlighted bits are the best parts." She says, handing Vaggie a list as she bounces excitedly.

"Just gonna ignore me breaking the fourth wall? Okay." Izuku shrugs as he eats another boston-cream donut.

"It's all highlighted. And is that a drawing?" She asked as she looked over the list.

"Yes! That's the happy ending! See!" She points at the very childlike drawing of a rainbow and stick figures with horns and halos. "Everyone is smiling and happy in Heaven!"

"And the one on the back?" Vaggie asked, gesturing to the picture on the other side. Which seemed to be of a multitude of lookalikes, three resembling Charlie ,Vaggie and Izuku respectively. Along with a miscellaneous mishmash of other things such as dogs, dolphins, and more rainbows. Along with a cartoonishly large looking cake.

"Our wedding!" She declared with a wide toothy smile, making their face flush a shade of pink for a few moments.

"Okay, we'll just file that away for a later discussion." Izuku coughed awkwardly as Charlie took the list back and quickly began looking it over.

"Hun, it isn't gonna be that simple. Just be cool and remember the talking points we went over." Vaggie sighed as she took Charlie by her shoulder and looked her dead in the eyes. "And. Do. Not. SING!" She said seriously.

"Okay, fine." She groaned as she began walking away. "I'll just have to rely on my impeccable improv skills." She said in a mawk accent as she made her way over to Killjoy.

"What are the chances that she actually doesn't sing?" Vaggie asked nervously.

"Slim to none on the best of days." Izuku sighed as he gave Vaggie one more reassuring kiss before following after her. "Don't worry. Worst case scenario I'll burn this place to the ground."

"Best case?"

"We'll roast marshmallows over the flames." He laughed lightly, smiling as he saw her let out a small giggle. "Wish us luck."

"Good luck,mis amores."

Izuku quickly caught up with Charlie and made their way over to the reporters' desk. Where Katie was finishing off the last dregs of a cigarette with Tom off in the corner probably wondering about how long he has left before retirement. Izuku takes Charlie's hand in his in a comforting manner.

"Hey there. I'm Charlie." She greeted, extending her free hand for a handshake.

"Katie Killjoy." She says disinterested as she crushed her cigarette in her hand. "I would say it's a pleasure to meet you but that would be a lie. And you can put that away." she says, gesturing to Charlie's still extended hand. "I don't the gays. I have standards after all."

Izuku's eyes twitched in slight annoyance at her words. He tried his best to remain calm as he watched her throw away her cigarette before she winced in pain as a bit of blue fire sparkled in her hand right before she threw it. He held back a chuckle as he watched her try and figure out what happened.

"Oh, yeah? How's that working out for you?" Charlie asked as she looked at a sign above her that read 'Hell's #1 News'.

"Look, my time is money so I'll keep this short. You're not here because we wanted you. You're here because Jeffrey couldn't make it for his cannibal cooking segment." She spoke with animosity as she gestured to a sign for said show. With a statement that read "It's Dahm Good!"

'Nor ever again.'Izuku mentally said before sighing to himself.'That reminds me I owe Rosie a favor and that is NOT a position I want to be in for too long.'

"And merely showing this hot piece of ass here will raise our ratings with all the horny f*ckers want to jerk off to him." Katie said, gesturing over to Izuku with a lustful smirk. Charlie gained an angry expression as she did so, with her horns poking out slightly before Izuku calmed her down. "You may be a royal big shot but that doesn't mean sh*t to me! I'm too rich and too influential to give a flying f*ck about what a tux wearing demon 'princess' wants to advertise."

Trench simply watched this routine play out shaking his head disapprovingly. All the while Katie kept on shaking her body in a weird way while still trying to appear threatening. Meanwhile it was now Charlie's turn to calm Izuku down to keep him from burning the place to the ground.

"But I-"

"So don't get cute with me! Or I will f*ckING bury you!" She interrupts her as multiple bones in her body start to crack.

'I swear to Satan if this bitch doesn't shut up I'm gonna reduce this place to ashes and then burn the ashes.'Izuku thinks as he starts cracking his knuckles, with small flames flickering as he does so.

"And we're live!"

"And we're back!" Katie rushes to her seat, causing her to snap her own neck. "So Charlotte..." She begins as she fixes her neck.

"It's Charlie."

"Whatever. Tell us about this new passion project you've been pestering our news station about." She says menacing as she fiddles with her pen. Making her feel very uncomfortable as Izuku places a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"Well...As most of you all know, I was born here in Hell." She begins nervously, Vaggie is giving her two thumbs up from the audience and Izuku smiling from beside. " Growing up I always tried to find good in people and sometimes it worked out and other times not so much. Hell is my home, and you are my people."

Katie, looking bored, notices a slug on the table and quickly stabs it with her pen. Getting some blood on Charlie's face, who brushes it off to resume her pitch. Though she did have to hold back a laugh as she watched Katie nearly fall off of her chair when the dead slug caught fire.

"We just went through another extermination. We lost so many souls and it breaks my heart to watch my people get slaughtered like this. No one is even given a chance!" She slams her fist on the table, waking up a certain Killjoy who was falling asleep. "And I cannot sit idling by as the place I call home is subjected to such violence and cruelty!

"So, we've been thinking, isn't there a more humane way to handle overpopulation here in hell? Perhaps an alternative way to change souls through redemption? Well I think yes! Ladies and gentlemen and all those in between, we're opening up the very first of its kind! A hotel that rehabilitates sinners!"

She yells out happily, getting a round of applause from her boyfriend. Everyone else simply sat in silence and stared at her expecting more from her. The stares make her shrink in her seat as Izuku looks over to her with concern. Her mood slowly shifted in the opposite direction it was in a few moments ago.

"Cause you know. Hotels are places for people who are passing through. Temporarily." She speaks softly with a bit of nervous laughter. "I figured it would serve a purpose. Someplace to work towards redemption. Yaaaay~"

"Stupid bitch." A cameraman said offscreen. Which caused Izuku to quickly glare in the direction with his fist ignited. Only for Vaggie to punch the little sh*t clear across the room as Charlie quickly swatted the flames out in a panic.

"Look. Every one of you has something good deep down inside you. I just know you do." She sighed before gaining a small smirk. "Maybe I'm just not getting through to you." She says, getting her bodyguards' attention.

"Oh, no!" Vaggie facepalmed seeing where this was going.

"Let's be honest, we all knew where this was going." Izuku let out a small bit of laughter as Charlie snapped her fingers. The lights shut off for a moment and a spotlight shined on her as Razzle and Dazzle had brought out a piano.

Charlie had finished her impromptu song and dance number with a confident smile on her face. Izuku stood not far behind her with a pleased smile on his face as he clapped for her performance. Eagerly awaiting for the responses of her people in the crowd who simply stood there in stunned silence. Many of them with looks of disbelief at the sheer display of the girl who was supposed to be next in line for the throne ruling over this cesspool they call home.

"Wow!" One demon, looking something akin to old style cartoon characters, finally spoke up from the audience. "That was sh*t!" He finished with a wicked grin. On cue each and every demon began busting their guts with laughter.

"What in the nine circles makes you think a single denizen of hell would give two sh*ts about being a better person?! You have no proof that your little experiment even works!" Katie yelled out between her fits of laughter. "You want people to be good just because?!"

"We already have a patron! He believes in our cause and has shown incredible progress!" Charlie declared, grabbing their attention for a moment.

"Oh, really? And who might that be?" Katie asked, not really caring as she looked over her nails.

"Just someone by the name of Angel Dust!"

"The p*rn star?" Tom asked with some amount of interest, which was quickly shattered when a grinning Katie turned her attention to him.

"You f*cking would Tom." She sneered before looking back at the couple. "That is not something worth bragging about. I bet that hooker would do anything for some booger sugar and lube." She said as she made a jerking motion with her hand.

"Well he's certainly braver than the lot of you morons." Izuku chimed in, a stone cold glare glued to his brow. "I mean, what can I expect from a bunch of washed up hazbins anyway."

"Ex-f*cking-cuse me?!" Katie's grin widened sinisterly as she cracked the desk. "Forgive me but I think I may have misheard you. Would you mind repeating that?" She said, getting dangerously close to the green haired male.

"Okay then, bitch." He said, clearly not giving any Fs as he shoved the women away from him. "And don't stand that close to me, I can smell your mother's ass from here."

"What?!"

"Oh, was I wrong? Was it your father's ass that you were kissing before you wound up down here?"

"Shut up! You have a lot of balls saying sh*t to me?!

"I guess you have quite a bit of experience with balls don't you?" Izuku commented, getting a few chuckles from onlookers. Which were silenced by Katie's glare. "It's all pretty obvious, constantly abusing your coworkers and saff. Lording your status over everyone's heads like you truly earned any of it."

"You bastard son of a-!"

"And not to mention incredibly quick to temper. Face it, I can read you like a magazine. Your parents didn't a single sh*t about you so you just kept doing what you thought would impress them. Which clearly didn't work out for you at all since you ended escalating your tactics to the point you straight up ruined everyone else's lives. And now you're here, your parent's ghost still shaping you into the whiny little bitch you are trying to get the approval that you know deep in your heart you don't deserve."

"Why-? You little- f*ckING PRICK!!!" She slammed her claws into the desk, shattering it into pieces. If one looked closely enough they could swear they saw miniscule tears building up in her eyes.

"Breaking news!"

"This just in! A new player has entered the ongoing turf war!" Tom yelled out suddenly trying to break the tension that was about to explode. "Let's cut to the live feed!"

"Aha! I'm a bad person!" A four armed, white furred individual yelled out as he squashed a living egg. Throwing grenades out into the distance of the battlefield.

"Oh, sh*t." Charlie gasped wide-eyed.

"'Oh, sh*t', indeed! The new player is none other than p*rn actor Angel Dust!" Katie said with minor glee. "What a juicy coincidence. You must feel really stupid right now."

"I'm gonna f*cking kill that over grown cum stained, ji*zz napkin eating, co*ck cucking, web faced moronic son of drug addicted whor* birthed of yeast infected vagin*!" Izuku yelled out as he stormed out of the room, shattering a wall as he did so.

"Save some for me!" Vaggie yelled out as she pulled out a spear from nowhere.

"Well, well, well. Looks like your idea is dead on arrival. So tell meprincess..." Katie glared with her eyes glowing a bright crimson. "How does it feel to be such a totalfailure!"She laughed so hard she nearly fell over.

"Well..um...How does it feel now that I got your pen? BITCH!" Her words quickly shut everyone up as they started back away slowly. "Uh.....Whoops...." She chuckled nervously.

Tom ran away in fear as Katie stood up in front of her. Her body grew extra limbs as the faint sounds of insectoid chirping was heard. She let out a monstrous roar as she stepped closer to her. Charlie gulped nervously as she slowly raised her hands in a defense manner.

'Months of Izuku's training don't fail me now!'

~Meanwhile~

"Thanks for the backup, Angie!" The cyclops woman, Cherri Bomb, said as she launched a bazooka into the frey.

"Are you kidding me?! This is the best action I've seen in ages!" Angel said as he laid back relaxed, throwing a grenade over his cover.

"Where have ya been, anyway? I thought went and die or some sh*t!"

"Oh, I wish!" Angel and Cherri quickly jumped into the field as he spoke. "I've been staying at this crappy hotel on the other side of town. So long as I play nice I can stay there rent free!"

"For serious?!"

"Yeah! No fights! No pranks! Noproblematic language! Their words, not mine!" he explained as he fired his tommy gun aimlessly. Using a baseball bat in his other hand he crushed several more eggbois happily. "These bitches are no fun! I've been clean for two whole weeks!"

"Holy sh*t!" Cherri said with a cackle as she threw even more bombs.

"I mean sorta clean." he smirked as he wiped some egg yolk off himself. "Only about as clean as you get with a sh*t ton of bolivian marching powder! I swear the only good thing about staying is being able to stare at some grade A beef for free!" He said with a laugh.

"Really now? Maybe I should come over if someone has actually caught your attention!"

"Maybe! I mean it's not every day you get to take a peek at one of Hell's top ten!" He smirked as he chucked an egg over to his gal pal.

"You're joking?! Top ten? Which one?!" Cherri asked as she swung a pipe into the eggboi, sending him flying into another group of eggs bowling-style.

"Number 4! The guy who beat Val!" Angel answered with a guttural laugh, getting a wild applause from her in response. "I tell ya, when they made that announcement Val literally got so pissed he gave himself a heart attack! We even got an entire week off so he could go on a vacay to calm down!"

"Oh! You lucky bitch! You have to send me pictures!"

"No prob!" Angel said right before a chain was wrapped around him. He was slung into some rubble courtesy of the serpentine Sir Pentious. Though all he could do was smirk as this happened. "Oh~ Harder Daddy!~"

"Son?! Is that you?!" The snake demon said with a strange sparkle in his eyes. While he was distracted, Cherri swooped in sounding like a train and kicked him away. "You whor*se have no class! In war the side remembered is the side with the most ssstyle!" He finished with a hiss as he adjusted his tie.

"Or the side that ain't dead!" Cherri commented as she tore open one of the eggbois.

"Speaking of style, is your hat alive or something!"

"Well that's none of your goddamn business! Now is it?"

"Does that make your hat the top and you the bottom!" He laughed as an egg 'ooooohed' at the burn. A sign that said 'loser' pointed at Pentious in the background.

"I'm gonna blow you to bitsss!"

"Hmm~ Kinky!~"

"Not like that! Pervert!" He yelled as a sign that said 'puss*' was now pointing at him.

As they laughed at the serpent man, an egg minion managed to sneak behind them with a weapon aimed right at Cherri. Angel quickly noticed this and shoved her away just as the weapon was fired. Launching tendrils that had wrapped themselves around his limbs, restraining him.

"Not so co*cky now, are we?" Sir Pentious questioned confidently, not at all getting what the situation was looking like. But I bet a lot of the weebs in the audience do.

"Dude, you really need to watch what comes out of your mouth. I've been making these sex jokes the whole TIME!" He yelled out as the tentacles stretched out his limbs. "And it's obvious you're not catching on. Which is just sad!" He yelled as he grew another set of arms and manifested a tommy gun.

"You think you're gonna get into a lot of trouble for this, Angie?" Cherri asked as she walked up behind him.

"Meh. What's one little brawl gonna cause?" Angel shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. Only to begin sweating when he heard a very familiar voice.

"ME GETTING REALLY f*ckING PISSED OFF!" Izuku yelled out as crashed into the ground, his flames burning the rubble to ashes beneath him. "Now would you mind explaining to me what the heck is going on?"

"Err....em......Hey there......Guy...." Angel began as he slowly started backing away slowly. "You see-OW!" He started only for Izuku to smack on the head Gibbs style.

"That was rhetorical." He growled angrily as the spider man rubbed his hand.

"You miserable son of a-" Pentious growled as he stood up only to see the new arrival on the field.

"Hey, Pentious."

"Oh, greetings Midoriya. How've you been?"

"Had worse days but certaining have had better ones too." Izuku shrugged as the other two simply stared at the exchange.

"So does the striped one work for you or what?"

"Not really, he just broke the one condition we had for him to stay at our hotel." Izuu leveled a glare at the p*rnstar who tried hsiu best not to meet his gaze.

"Speaking of, is that boiler room still giving you issues?"

"Oh, no. It's working pretty great. Thanks for the parts by the way."

"It was no issue. I had the extras just lying around so it's good they got put into use."

"Um....Hello!" Cherri yelled out, cutting their conversation short. "We were kind of in the middle of something here!" He said as she lit a fuse on one of her bombs.

"And I'm just here to collect the moron."

"Hey!"

"It's the truth, Angel and you know it."

"I'd actually like to finish what I started, Midoriya. If that isn't an issue." Pentious stated as some of his eggbois had managed to regroup.

"Fine, but don't think that this is the end, Angel!" Izuku said as he walked off away from the battle.

"We're still friends after this, right?"

"Yes!"

"Thank you!" Pentious took a few guns from his minions as he smirked. "Now where were we?"

"Ass kicking time!"

The three individuals screamed as they rushed back into battle. Izuku simply sat off to the side on some rubble watching the carnage while snacking on some chips he stole on his way out of the studio. Knowing full well that he was likely gonna need to calm a very pissed off Vaggie later. Or worse, a pissed off Charlie.

~Later~

The battle was over and everyone involved was either recovering or on their way home. The royal limo drove through the relatively unscathed streets with ease as on the inside Angel could be seen entertaining himself by messing with the window. All the while Vaggie was glaring at him angrily, her eye twitching as she was barely able to keep herself from attacking.

Sat beside her was a very upset Charlie who hugged her knees to her chest as she hid behind some of her hair. She was sitting on Izuku's lap as said male hugged her warmly. Gently caressing her in a comforting manner as he placed several small kisses to her head to ease her strife.

"What?" Asked Angel as he finally noticed the glares he was receiving.

"What? WHAT?! What were you thinking?!" Vaggie sneered as she pulled out her hair in frustration.

"I owed my girl buddy a solid! Isn't that aredeemingquality, helping friends with stuff?"

"Not with turf wars that result in territorial genocide!"

"Eh! You win some, you lose a few hundred." he said with a chuckle as he went back to mess with the window. "It wasn't that bad anyway." He barely dodged a knife being thrown at him.

"The next one won't miss." Vaggie growled as she continued to glare at the idiot.

"I had too! My credibility was one the line! What would've happened to my reputation if people found out I was trying to go clean! It throws out my entire persona!" He punctuated his sentence by emphasizing his chest fluff.

"Your reputation! What about the hotel's?!" Izuku yelled out with small bits of fire sparking from his hair. "That little stunt you pulled made us look like a freaking joke!"

"Nah nah, babe! Jokes are funny! I made you look more...er....sad! And pathetic!" He stated, causing Charlie's mood to sour even more. "LIke an orphan with no arms or legs...oh! With progeria!" He paused for a moment before he let out an exasperated sigh. "Great! Now I'm down in the dumps! This thing have any liquor?"

"Angel, shut up before I light you on fire."

"Can you at least try and take this seriously?"

"Fine I'll try.Just don't get your taco in a twist baby."

"Was that you trying to be sexist or racist?"

"Whichever pisses you off more!" He grumbled as he continued to roll around the limo floor. "Is there seriously no liquor in here?!"

"I'm gonna kill him."

"Get in line, Vaggie."

"Dibs on his lungs."

"Dibs on his legs."

"Already dead! Wait, would that make me double dead? Where would I go? Double Hell?"

"¡Con una mierda, malparido hijo de-!"

"Come on! Who cares if some jerk offs got hurt? Most of them are a bunch ugly freaks anyway. Just look around you got a bunch of harlequin looking f*ckers down here."

"Like you're one to talk." Vaggie smirks as Izuku lets out a small chuckle.

"I'll have you know this body is flawless! Everyone wants a piece of me and I got all the creepy fan mail to prove it." He says as he pulls out one of said letters from his fluff. Which was of a creepy looking guy hugging an Angel body pillow asking for feet pics.

"And away with that sh*t." Izuku says as the letter in Angel's hand gets set on fire and crumbles away.

"That was really uncool of you Angel." Charlie speaks up in a disappointed tone.

"Uncool! After that fiasco no one's gonna want to stay at the hotel! All thanks to you and your selfish bullsh*t!" Vaggie screamed at Angel who really didn't seem to care.

"Does that mean I don't have a free room anymore?"

"Angel, I have half a mind to throw you and that pig of yours into a dumpster from the Cannibal Colony."

"Hey! You leave Nuggs out of this!"

"Alright! Settle down everyone!" Charlie speaks out before things could escalate further. "Don't worry. We don't know if anything is over just yet so let's all try and keep our spirits up, right?" She places a reassuring hand on Vaggie's shoulder as Izuku holds her free hand.

"How are you always able to cheer me up, Apple Pie?" Izuku smiled as he placed a kiss on her forehead. Getting a smile from her and Vaggie as the limo was brought to a stop.

They soon entered the 'Happy Hotel', walking into the lobby of the establishment filled with unopened crates and boarded up windows and doors. Vaggie let out a tired groan as she sat herself on one of the torn couches and facing the wall. Angel with a deadpan expression goes over to a fridge that was leaning against the wall. Taking out a box of popsicles from the freezer, which wasn't doing its job right since the thing was leaking.

"You know it might be a good idea to get some actual food here." Angel comments as he nibbles on the most likely expired frozen treat. "Gotta feed all thosewayward soulssomehow, right?" He chuckled lightly, getting a vicious glare from Izuku.

Angel ignored it however as he saw Charlie's mood becoming more downtrodden. For a moment it seemed that he wanted to say something to her but decided against it and walked away. Izuku let out a sigh as he went over to his fiance, wrapping her in a shoulder hug as he took a seat beside her.

"Hey Charlie." He says getting her attention. "When do you think a joke becomes a dad joke?" He asked with an awkward smile.

"When it becomes apparent?" She tried to answer with slight confusion evident on her face.

"I was gonna say when it leaves for milk and never comes back, but that works too." He smirked, getting a soft bit of laughter from the blond. "There's that smile."

"Izuku, that was terrible."

"It made you laugh, didn't it?" He chuckled, placing a kiss to her forehead. "We're gonna get through this, you know. Even if all of Pride thinks we're a joke we'll be having the last laugh."

"You've sure come a long way since we first met. You know that?"

"Yup. And it's all thanks to some beautiful and adorable girls that helped me along the way."

"Oh really?" Charlie gave a quizzical smile as she leaned on his shoulder. "Remind me to thank them later. I think they deserve something nice for being so kind and helpful."

"Oh, I think I've given them some pretty goodrewardsbut a few moregiftswould certainly be appropriate."

"I think that'd be a great idea~" She gave him a kiss to the lips that lasted a few seconds before they separated. "I gotta make a call really quick. You should probably check on Vaggie too." She said as she stood up and made her way out of the door. A forlorn expression as she did so.

Izuku knew right away just who she was gonna call, quite possibly the one family tie she connects to the most. Her mother, a woman that no one has seen or heard from in over seven years. He understood though why she felt the need to do so, as she's done before on many occasions. He didn't dwell on it for too long, though. Focusing his attention to his other lover who was still staring blankly at a wall.

"Are you doing okay, Vags?" Izuku queried as he sat beside, quickly lifting her and placing her on his lap.

"Not really." She answered, as she instinctively sunk into him, laying her head on his chest. "Just pissed off about everything today."

"I know what you mean, but we expected to be met with some....."

"Ridicule? Disdain? Scorn?"

"Yeah, pretty much." He sighed as he began gently petting and, much like a cat, she leaned into the act of affection. "Let's be honest, this whole idea seems rather ludicrous at first but I think we really did get through to some people."

"At this point, I don't think we did."

"Vaggie, not everyone is gonna be onboard with this but that doesn't mean there aren't people who would be willing to give it a shot." He gave a small sigh as he looked her in the eye. "All that means is that we just gotta keep on moving forward. We can't let the voices of those who have given up sway us from helping those that still have some shred of hope."

"How can you say things like that so easily? Especially after everything, not just from today, buteverything." She looks down as she starts to shrink in his grasp.

"Vaggie, we've all been through some sh*t. And maybe that sh*t led us here in the first place." He held her tightly as he kissed her forehead softly. "But in the end we're still stronger than most could ever be. Trying to make a difference and help as many as we can. Because in the end all of us are only human."

She stared up at him for a few seconds before a smile reached her lips. Moving up and wrapping her arms around his neck as she kissed him deeply. This lasted for a few moments before they separated, leaving them staring lovingly in one another's' eyes.

"What have I done to deserve you?Mi heroico amante de los demonios."

"I don't know, but from what I remember from the day we first met it had something to do with almost stabbing me with a spear." He smirked as her face flushed with embarrassment.

"You jerk!" She hit him in a playful manner, smiling as she did so before resting her head to his chest again. "I love you."

"I love you too.Mi chica gótica picante."

"Do you guys think you can be any sweeter?" Angel asked, alerting them of his presence. "I think I still have some teeth left. Might make my job easier if I lost them." He joked, making Vaggie growl with vicious animosity.

"Eres una miserable puta de mierda."

"Can't understand a word you said but I'm pretty sure that was an insult." Angel said as he quickly flipped her the bird. "So f*ck you too."

Meanwhile, as this conversation was happening, Charlie had made her way out onto the porch. Taking out her phone and scrolling through her contacts she selected the number for her mother. The phone grunting as she pressed 'call' and awaited for her cue to speak.

"Hey, mom!" She said in a disappointed tone as she was yet again sent to voicemail. "I know I keep calling, and well I guess you must be busy. Really busy." She spoke in a low tone as she leaned on the wall. "The interview didn't go well, and well, I could really use some advice right now. I don't know what I'm doing and I feel like I'm dragging everyone down. I'm not even sure if I'm actually helping anyone. I....I think dad was right about me." At this point she was starting to cry as she fell to the ground.

"Anyway." She wiped away her tears as she stood back up. "I'll stop before this gets too long. I love you. Bye." She hung up the call as went back inside.

Slumping against the door, she closed her eyes just wanting this day to be over with. She was just about to leave before she heard someone knocking on the door. An ominous aura about it as she slowly opened. Revealing a tall menacing figure clad in red with his eyes staring right into her being.

"Hel-!" The man began before she quickly slammed the door on him. Not wanting to believe she saw who she thought she did, she opened it again. "-lo!" He finished just as she slammed the door again.

"Vaggie! Izuku!"

"Yes?" Izuku said from his seat with Vaggie slightly groaning in response.

"The Radio Demon is at the door!"

"What?!" Vaggie, now with her full attention, yelled out in a panic.

"Uh, who?" Angel asked, completely oblivious from his seat on the couch.

"What should I do?" Charlie gasped as she held her face in worry.

"Don't let him in!"

Ignoring her warning, Charlie went back to the door where said radio demon was still waiting. A bored expression on his face as he looked down on the princess, somewhat awaiting another response like before.

"May I speak now?"

"You may."

"Alastor! Pleasure to meet you sweetheart! Quite the pleasure!" He said excitedly as he quickly took her hand for a rough handshake. "Excuse my sudden visit but I saw your little fiasco on a picture show! And I just could resist! What a performance! I haven't been that entertained since the stock market crash of 1929!" He laughed loudly as he walked into the lobby. "So many orphans."

Before he could walk any further he was stopped by a sudden spear being aimed for his face courtesy of Vaggie. And Izuku, who glared at the demon with much malice as he aimed a rod burning flames at him as well.

"Hold it right there!Cabrón hijo de perra!I know your game, and I'm not gonna let you hurt anyone here! You pompous, cheesy, talk show sh*tlord!" She yelled as she put the blade close to his smiling face.

"My dear, if I wanted to hurt anyone here." His face shifted into looking like an actual radio from his time."I would have done so already!"His face glitched as symbols started floating around him.

"Just tell us what you want before I turn you into a pile of ashes!" Izuku yelled as his flames became more enraged with his fury.

"Simply put I'm here to help!"

"Say what now?" Charlie raised a brow in confusion.

"Help!" He laughed at their confusion as he tapped at his staff. "Hello! Is this on? Testing! Testing!"

"Well I heard you loud and clear!"The staff called out.

"You want to help? With..."

"This ridiculous thing you're trying to do! This hotel!" Alastor chimes as he quickly teleports behind the three. "I want to help you run it!"

"But why?"

"Why does anyone do anything? Sheer! Absolute! Boredom! I've lacked inspiration for decades. My work became mundane, lacking focus. Aimless!" He yelled as he shoved Vaggie away, who was quickly caught by Izuku. "Ive come to crave a new kind of entertainment!"

"Does getting into a fist fight with a reporter count as entertainment?" She asked with a nervous chuckle.

"I liked it when you kicked Katie in the face." Izuku gave her a thumbs up, making her blush lightly.

"It's the purest kind, my dear: Reality! True passion! After all, the world's a stage and the stage is a world of entertainment." Alastor said as his feedback cut out for a moment.

"So does that mean you think it's possible to rehabilitate a demon?" She asks with hope in her voice, only for it to be cut short by the man's laughter.

"Of course not! That's wacky nonsense! Redemption, oh the non-existent humanity! No, no, no, no. I don't think there's anything left that could save such loathsome sinners!" he says as he looks over to Vaggie who is offended and Angel who just shrugs. Izuku all the while simply cracked his knuckles as he glared at the red deer man. "The chance given was the life they lived before, the punishment is this!" He said as he gestured to all of Hell itself. "There is no undoing what is done!"

"So then why do you want to help me if you don't believe in my cause?"

"Consider it an investment in ongoing entertainment for myself!" He pulls Charlie close to him and twirls her. "I want to watch the scum of the world struggle to climb up the hill of betterment only to repeatedly trip and tumble down to the fiery pit of failure."

"Right." She says as she removes his hand.

"Yes indeedy! I see great things coming your way and who better to help you than I?" He said as he attempted to grab her waist, only for his arm to be grabbed by Izuku.

"I suggest you keep your hands to yourself before learning how a rotisserie chicken over an open fire feels." He growled with bits of smoke coming from his hand, burning Alastor's skin slightly.

"You've made your point my friend." He laughed, not batting an eye to the threat on the surface. No one the wiser to the small bead of sweat that fell down his face. "Now how about a short tour of the place! I am just loving this vintage design. It reminds me of home." He quickly changed the subject as he walked away with the two in tow.

"So what's the deal with smiles over there?" Angel asked in confusion, much to Vaggie's chagrin.

"Wiat? You've been here longer than me! Longer than Izuku! How have you not heard of him?" She questioned the adult film actor, shrugging clueless. "The Radio Demon? One of the most powerful beings Hell has ever seen?"

"Eh. Not too big on politics."

"Decades ago, Alastor manifested in Hell, seemingly overnight. He began to topple Overlords who have been dominant for centuries. That kind of raw power had never been harnessed by a mortal soul before. Then, he broadcast his carnage all throughout Hell just so everyone could witness his ability. Sinners started calling him "The Radio Demon" (as lazy as that is). Many have speculated what unimaginable force enabled him to rival our world's most ancient and destructive evils. But one thing's for sure: He's an unpredictable source of danger, a wicked spirit of mystery, and a violent monster of chaos, the likes of which we can't risk getting involved with unless we want to end up erased!"

"Ya done?" Angel asked before letting out a dry laugh. "The guy looks like a strawberry pimp!"

"Well, I don't trust him."

"To be fair, do you trust any man? Any men? Men?" He asked, getting a deadpan expression from the girl before she gestured to the green haired male who glared at him as he seemed to have heard his comment.

"Charlie, listen to me." She quickly grabbed onto her shoulder. "You can't believe this creep! He isn't just a happy face! He's a deal-maker! Pure evil! He can't be redeemed! And is most likely looking for a way to destroy everything we're trying to do!"

"I..." Charlie sighed as she held her girlfriend's hands. "We don't know that. Look, I know he's bad, and I know he probably doesn't wanna change, but the whole point of this is to give people a chance." She watches as the man inspect a portrait of the royal family. "To have faith things will be better! How can I turn someone away? I can't. It goes against everything I'm trying to do. Everything I believe in. Just... trust me. I can take care of myself!"

"Charlie, I would normally agree with you but some people just don't deserve a second chance." Izuku said as he stared at the overlord. "Just please tread carefully."

"And whatever you do, don't make a deal with him!" She warned as she watched the demon make a small hand gesture. Seemingly hearing her warning.

"Don't worry, I picked up one thing from my dad!" She smiled as she imitated her dad's voice. "You don't take sh*t from other demons!" He walks off over to Alastor as Izuku simply holds Vaggie in a side hug.

"Okay, so, Al. You're sketchy as f*ck and you clearly see what I'm trying to do here as a joke." As Charlie turns away, glowing red symbols start to appear beside Alastor which quickly disappear after Charlie turns back to Alastor. "But, I don't. I think everyone deserves a chance to prove they can be better. So, I'm taking your offer to help. On the condition that there be no... tricks or voodoo strings attached."

"So it's a deal then?" As Alastor rolls his eyes at that last statement, he twirls his mic staff and presents his hand for a handshake as green energy bursts throughout the hotel.

"Nope! No shaking! No deals." She coughed lightly as she refocused herself. "As Princess of Hell and heir to the throne I hereby order you to help with this hotel. For as long as you desire." She smiles nervously as she looks over to Vaggie and Izuku for approval. "Sound fair?"

"Fair enough!" He retracted his staff as he hummed and walked off.

"Cool beans." She sighed in relief as she gave two thumbs up. Alastor continues to hum while looking around as he stops in front of Vaggie.

"Smile, my dear!" He tickles the underside of her chin before Izuku swats him away. "You know you're never fully dressed without one! So where is your hotel staff?"

"Uh, well..." Charlie pans over to Izuku and Vaggie who were still glaring at Alastor.

"Ohohoho, you're going to need more than that." He walks towards Angel Dust with a small smile. "And what can you do, my effeminate fellow?"

"I can suck you dick?" Angel proclaimed, resulting in mic feedback that can be heard in the background as Alastor tries to process what he was just offered.

"Ha! No!"

"Your loss!"

"Well, this just won't do!" He takes out his mic staff. "I suppose I can cash in a few favors to liven things up."

At the snap of his finger, a new fireplace has replaced the hotel's worn down one as he approaches it and picks up the mysterious figure covered in soot, which then opens its eye and stares at the trio behind him. Soon enough the soot poofed away showing a small cyclops-like demon with pointed limbs, white skin and one large eye. Her eye sports a light yellow iris, thick eyelashes, and a hot-pink sclera with a yellow gradient.

Her red-pink hair is kept into a slightly messy bob cut with swirls on each side, and a single light yellow streak located at the top. Her mouth has sharp light yellow teeth inside and black lips, and small hot-pink dots on each of the corners.

"This little darling is Nifty!" Alastor introduced as he dropped her to the floor.

"Hi, I'm Niffty! It's nice to meet you! It's been a while since I've made new friends! Why're you all women? Are there any men here?!" She yelled as she lifted Charlie with zero effort, soon putting her down. "I'm sorry, that's rude. Oooh, man! This place is filthy! It really needs a lady's touch! Which is weird because you're all ladies, no offense." She stares off as she begins cleaning and killing bugs. "Oh, my gosh! This is awful! Nope! Nope! Nope! Nope! Nope!"

As she began her cleaning and slaughtering of bugs that were minding their own business. The others in the room simply stared at her, slightly nerved by the small one's quirkiness. Her eye widened as she finally laid eyes on Izuku who looked away awkwardly.

"A man!" She rushed over to him quickly in a flash. Holding onto his shirt tightly as she stared deep into his eyes. "A handsome sexy manly man is here! You will be mine!" She said menacingly. Making everyone except Alastor stare with discomfort.

"I have girlfriends, and a fiance. So you best look elsewhere." He said blankly, getting a gasp from the small woman.

"This is just like my comics!" She let out a happy laugh as she frantically danced around him. "Oooohhh~ I'm gonna be another one of you mistresses!~ Or maybe a slave!~ Please order me!~"

"Umm....Help!" Izuku cried out as he tried to get away from the clearly crazy woman who began to chase after him.

"Can't he just blast her away or something?" Angel asked, slightly disturbed by the scene.

"He's too nice to do that. At least to someone who isn't a threat." Vaggie sighed as she rubbed her temple.

"Hah!" A new voice came. Off to the side appeared a cat like demon with red wings. His look is evocative of a magician, paired with a casino referencing playing-card theme. The sclera of his eyes are black, with yellow irises and slitted pupils. He has long, red eyebrows with black vertical stripes near the tips, and a small black heart above each eyebrow.

"Read 'em and weep, boys! Full Ho-" He says as demonic illusions and voices distort the surroundings temporarily. "-tel? What the f*ck is this?" He looks around for a moment before his eyes find sight of Alastor. "You!"

"Husker my good friend! Glad you could make it!

"Don't you 'Husker' me you son of a bitch! I was about to win the whole damn pot!" He said, gesturing to a stack of money and chips that soon disappeared from sight.

Chapter 3: Family Comes

Chapter Text

The light of day in the Ring of Pride seeped through the curtains of the bedroom window. The room that belonged to the three lovers, Izuku, Charlie and Vaggie. It was fairly early in the morning as Izuku began to stir awake, blinking a few times as his vision cleared up. A smile on his face as he looked down at the peaceful expressions on the two girls' faces as they slept. Latched onto him tightly as if he was gonna float away.

Which he was seeing as he had a routine to keep up with. So he did his best to carefully unfurl himself out of their arms and out of the bed. Leaving the two to quickly grab onto one another as their main source of warmth had left them. Chuckling at the sight he gently readjusted the blanket over them and gave them each a quick peck to the cheek. The two smiled at the feeling as he soon left the room.

He typically preferred to start his days early, mainly to give himself enough time to properly prep himself for whatever the day brought. That and considering it's about six am no one else would be awake to bother him. Mainly Angel. Right now however he was heading to the kitchen to make food for himself and the girls since they should be awake within the next hour.

"Why good morning my good sir!" A familiar radio voice filled his ears, much to his slight annoyance. "Good to see someone else has the foresight to wake up early. After all, the early bird gets worms you know!"

"Morning to you too, Al. I guess I shouldn't be surprised that you are up considering your radio show days."

"Yes, it's a habit that I can't break from. My show may have been on a long hiatus but with the new entertainment on the way I am simply ecstatic to get it up and running again." He laughed with a wide smile, a short laugh track trailing behind his voice.

"Oh, how I shake with anticipation." Izuku said sarcastically, letting out a sigh as he went into the kitchen. "Do you want anything or are you good?"

"Offering me a meal? And here I thought you didn't like me that much."

"I may not like you but that doesn't mean I am not a good host."

"How kind of you, however I have already had my breakfast. In fact, I was just about to head out for my morning stroll when I caught you." He continued to smile as he began walking away. "I will be back later today, I have some business to take care of. Do give my best to the princess for me."

"Alrighty then. If you happen to visit Rosie, mind telling her I will be free this weekend so she can cash in her favor then."

"Will do." And like that Alastor had left. Leaving Izuku to sigh in some form of relief.

"Whelp. Better get back to breakfast. I think something sweet will make Charlie happy. Pancakes and a fruit owl maybe." He mused to himself as he started getting every set up. "Vaggie is gonna want something a bit more on the savory side, though. A good omelet will do her some good."

Several items began floating around him as he began his task. As he was mixing some batter, he felt a small vibration in his pocket for him to raise an eyebrow in slight confusion. The bowl floated away as he checked the message he had received from a contact simply titled "White Star".

'Well this will either end really good or really bad.' He thought with a small hum as all the utensils and ingredients continued to float about and continue meal preparation. Looking over the message as he replied.

White Star: "Are we still set to meet today?"

"Yes. I am still free today."

"Glorious. Shall I have something special prepared for our activities?

"Nothing in particular should be needed.
Unless you have something planned.😏"

"Perhaps~ You'll just have to wait and see darling~"

He let out a small chuckle at the messaging. Putting his phone away he quickly went back to what he was doing. Allowing him to finish what he was doing. Though, he would be lying if he said he wasn't at least the tiniest bit excited for what he was gonna be involved with later today. But right now he chose to finish what he was doing.

"Razzle! Dazzle!" Izuku called out as the two baphomet demons soon came flying down. They hovered readily as he handed them each a tray of food. "I want you two to take these up to the girls. And don't worry, I'm making you guys some right now." He ordered, the two winged demons smiling happily as they gave a salute before flying away.

"Now onto my food." He mused as he looked over what he left. "Basic breakfast it is." He chuckled as he finished up frying some bacon, which of course he kept the fat because it's pretty much liquid gold. Vegans out their who want to complain and argue about that can f*ck off. Don't make your life choices everyone else's problem.

Anyway, tangent aside, Izuku continued on making his meal. Occasionally scrolling on his phone to look through whatever notifications he had gotten. While also going through his schedule to make adjustments in case something came up and setting up some personal days. He got so engrossed in what he was doing, he didn't notice the tiny taps that were behind him. That is until he felt something tapping against his leg to get his attention.

Looking down at the floor he saw the small creature that awaited his attention. Animal that was one of the few actual pets that were kept at the hotel. A small pink pig demon with various darker pink spots along his body. He has large black eyes that have been shown to glow in the dark, and appears to have eyes on the side of his body that glow as well. It also has both pink and black spikes along his body and he boasts a mouthful of pointy sharp teeth and a curly tail with a quadrilateral barb at the end of it. He also has little dark pink hooves.

"Hey there, Nuggs." He giggled a bit as he squatted down to pet the small creature. "What are you up to all by yourself?"

The pig merely oinked as he seemed to be trying to climb up on him. He also hopped a few times in the direction of the counter to allude to what he was wanting. Something that caused Izuku to raise an eyebrow at the little boi.

"Seriously? You want this?" He asked him as he showed him a small piece of bacon, the pig spinning in response. "You realize this is bacon, right? You know, pork? And you are pork!" The pig only nodded at him, making him sigh. "Alright, fine you little cannibal. Hopefully Angel won't mind." He said as he tossed the strip away, the pig quickly going after it and even catching it in his mouth.

"Was that a pig eating bacon?" Someone from the other end of the kitchen asked. Looking over to the side he saw Husk was up and about and rubbing his temple lightly. "Guess that's not the strangest thing I've seen after a bad night drinking."

"Hangover?"

"Hangover."

"Do you want a Prairie Oyster or just some plain coffee?"

"Coffee."

"You still like it with cream and sugar or do you want it black?"

"Surprise me."

"I got some food left if you're hungry."

"Sure." He gave a thumbs up as he went over to a small table. Not having to wait long as a plate or bacon pancakes and a coffee was set before him. "Thanks."

"No prob." Izuku smiled as he finished up his plate. A fairly large portion of pancakes, eggs, bacon, hash browns, coffee and orange juice. Soon taking a spot beside the winged cat demon on the small table.

"This brings back memories." Husk commented as he sipped his drink.

"Oh, yeah. I always made breakfast when I stayed over." Izuku hummed lightly as he continued to munch. "Which was quite a bit now that I think about it."

"Not my fault you didn't have a place to live for over a year after landing down here."

"I happen to remember you enjoying my company."

"And you thought we weren't dating." Husk sighed as he recalled many memories of those times.

"To be fair, how was I supposed to know living together, hanging out, eating together, sharing a bed, and holding hands on occasion counted as dating?" Husk could only stare at the green haired young man with the biggest most unamused deadpan imaginable. "Point taken."

"Gotta say though, maybe it was for the best that my bar got destroyed." Husk gave a dry chuckle as he finished his meal. "With my bar in pieces and my apartment with it, you had to find somewhere else to go and by the looks of things it landed you in a pretty nice spot."

"Still hurt though, not being able to talk to one of the only people down here I actually knew. Pretty much had to start off from scratch." Izuku thought back to it all. "I even had to use the gambling tricks you taught me. Got plenty of money from it, even scored myself some deals and souls from a bunch of idiots. Funny how that was all in my first two years down here."

"I know what that's like." Husk looked down at his half empty cup somberly. "Having that sort of power in your hands. Getting even more through whatever means you can. It's all intoxicating when you're a gambler."

"Well, at the very least it didn't go south for me. Constantly throwing myself into bets and booze and whatever else I could find." Izuku closed his eyes for a moment, letting out a deep shaky breath. "Though it did lead me to finding out I can travel between rings."

"How did that happen?"

"Got drunk, blacked out and woke up in a Lust Ring motel with about five succubi." He let a small chuckle at that memory, and what it eventually led to. "Though the staff weren't too happy about what we left behind."

"Knowing you, that makes a lot of sense."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"C'mon. You know why." Husk smirked with a cackle that made him roll his eyes.

"Laugh it up, Husky! Just remember who was on top during our many many sleepless nights together." Izuku smiled as he watched the gambler freeze with a faint shade of red on his face. "What's the matter? Remembering all the things we did together?~Gambit~"

"You really shouldn't be flirting with someone other than your girls, you know that." He coughed into his hand before finishing his coffee.

"I don't think they'd mind." Izuku smiled constantly as he stared at him up and down. "After all, I do so much more than flirt with all our other partners~"

"What?" Husk went still as shock became evident on his face.

"Oh, yeah. Should probably explain that a bit more." Izuku finished his coffee as he gathered his dishes and brought them to the sink. "You see we have a bit more of a polyamorous relationship. We all are aware of one another and consent to each others' involvement and whoever else may potentially join our polycule. Like one big happy family."

"WHAT?!" A new voice entered the room as Angel, clad in only a robe with Nuggets in his arms, stared at the two with shock.

"How long have you been standing there?" Husk questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"About halfway through the conversation we are definitely talking about those sexy times later. But that's beside the point!" Angel dashes over to Izuku and holds him tight by the shoulders, shocking the slightly shorter male. "So you're saying I have shot?!"

"I-I mean, maybe?" Izuku let out a nervous little laugh. "It kinda depends on everyone else involved. If you can get their approval then yeah you have a chance."

"Dammit, and that means Toots too." Angel grumbled in disappointment as he snuggled his pig. "And that broad ain't ever gonna approve of another man joining in."

"Actually there is another man in our group."

"Oh come on!"

"Will you quit bellyaching!" Husk yelled in annoyance, leaving his dishes in the sink before exiting the room.

"Nice talking to ya Husk. Should catch up some more later." Said man simply gave him a small wave as he left the room. Leaving the two other males alone together.

"So~" Angel turned on his well trained p*rnstar flirtatious charm as he sauntered close to him. "Got any plans today, handsome?~" He traced his finger playfully along abdomen, going lower with each passing second.

"Not with you,pendejo!" Vaggie materialized out of nowhere, grabbing the furry man by his collar and shoving him away.

"A little harsh, Vaggie, but it's true." Charlie piped up as she entered the room. Letting out an awkward laugh as she tried to calm down her spicy girlfriend. "Since everything should be calm enough now, we're gonna be picking up our kids today."

"Good thing too, I miss my little princesses." Izuku pouted slightly before letting out a sigh.

"And you are just gonna spoil them nonstop for at least a month when they get back." Vaggie spoke with a small knowing smirk at her lover. "Which means everyone is gonna need to be careful with how they act around here." She said, leveling a glare at Angel.

"Hey! I may be a co*ked up, dick sucking hoe, but I can watch my mouth when there are kids around. I'm not that big of an idiot."

"Evidence would say otherwise." Vaggie deadpanned, getting a snarl from furry individual. Charlie chuckled as she and Izuku watched their girlfriend bicker with the spider man.

"And later today I'm gonna need to head out for abusinessmeeting with an associate." Izuku said, causing Charlie to let out a small sigh. "C'mon, Apple Pie, she isn't that bad. She's gotten a lot better since this arrangement was made."

"I know, I know." She continued to pout. "I just don't like how she just pays you for your time and doesn't even bother coming over to actually talk with any of us."

"Would it make you feel better if I promised to do something special for you?"

"Yes."

"Alright then." He chuckled as he started heading over to the sink. "Now you all go on about your morning while I clean this all up."

"I'll do it!" Niffty yelled as she jetted across the room. "Let this good girl clean this mess up! And give the good girl a kiss for a reward!" She squeaked as she latched herself on Izuku, snuggling up close to him. "Please~"

"I can handle this, besides I made the mess anyway."

"But I really wanna do it! Good girls get rewards and this good girl wants a kiss from the sexy man!~"

"Um...Girls.....help...." He said, only to see his girlfriends slowly backing away from the crazy girl. "You traitors! I'll have your asses for this!"

"You can have my ass anytime you wish, Daddy~" Nifty drooled as she began rubbing herself on him.

"Seriously! Please help!"

"Just give her what she wants." Angel spoke up now with a coffee he just poured himself. "I don't see the big deal. Just give her a kiss and she does her job."

"Easy for you to say, Angel!" He yelled in exasperation, the adult film actor laughing at his dismay as he and his pet left the room. Leaving him all alone with the small psychopathic boy-crazy woman. Who was still rubbing herself all over him and sniffing him very deeply.

"You smell wonderful~" She said in a dreamy tone that made him fairly uncomfortable.

"I haven't even showered yet."

"I know~" She inhaled once more. "I can wash you so good~ I can be very thorough~" He could've sworn her pupil had changed into a heart as she spoke.

"Yeah, no....I can handle that myself. Thank you!" He said as he gently pried her off of him, which was no easy feat. "But as for the mess ...Well if you really want to clean it I won't stop you."

"Really?!" She cried out excitedly. "Does that mean I'm gonna get a kiss?~ Please give me a good girl kiss~"

"Alright then. I guess a small kiss won't hurt." He sighed, not realizing what he had just agreed to.

In a flash, Niffty willed as much strength in her body to drag him down to the floor. A wide blush on her face as she planted her lips to his. Forcefully putting her tongue into it as a full blown make out session had started between the two. Not wanting to be outdone, Izuku let his instincts take over. Quickly taking over as she wrapped her arms around his neck, completely submitting to him.

It took them a few minutes to stop and even then she resisted. A Massive blush on her face as she panted heavily. Almost dancing in glee as he tried to get back up. Letting out a nervous chuckle as he did so while she continued to bounce around happily.

"Okay we're even now. I gotta go shower." He said as he began to leave the room.

"I'm gonna suck you off while you sleep~" She whispered to herself as she went off to clean the mess in the kitchen.

"What was that?" He asked with a nervous sweat dripping down his face. Hoping he heard her wrong.

"Nothing~"

He soon picked up the pace as he raced out of the kitchen and left for his room. Definitely feeling the need for that shower now that shower more than ever. His mind racing with many thoughts of the sequence of future events that he has begun from that one single moment. And most of them invoke feelings of fear and arousal. Something he's not unfamiliar with at this point.

By the time he had returned to his room, his mind had calmed down enough where he could continue on with his plans. After finding a nice clean set of clothes for him to wear for the rest of the day he entered the bathroom to undress for his shower. But once he entered it he was met by the sight of both Vaggie and Charlie naked as they were when he woke up this morning and in one another's embrace.

"Don't just stand there, mister." Vaggie smirked as she gave Charlie a playful smack to her ass. Eliciting a moan and a blush from the blonde.

"Get in here already." Charlie smiled playfully as she began fondling Vaggie's petite bust.

"This has been a good morning." He smiled as he quickly closed the door behind him.

~Small Time Skip~

Some time after the lovers' little escapade in the shower, which took way longer than it should have and cost a lot of water, the trio were now sitting in the back of the royal limo. Awaiting to arrive at their destination while Izuku was on his phone texting a contact simply labeled as "Kitten".

Kitten: "Almost up top now."

"Cool! I hope there weren't any issues.

How are the kids holding up?"

"They're alright. Just a little worried.
Especially since Extermination wasn't that long ago."

"Well I'll be sure to get them a nice treat.
And one for my special little Kitten~"

"I look forward to it~ Nya~"

"I hope you two aren't gonna start sexting." Vaggie jokes as she looks over his shoulder. "At least the girls are alright. Hopefully it stays calm for a while."

"I mean, considering most demons aren't idiots to think they can start trouble in my territory we should be fine."

"Speaking of, we still need to get a good teacher for them." Charlie said as she shook her head. "Which won't be easy considering your reputation at this point."

"What I did to those schools was not my fault."

"Sweetie. I say this love but..." Vaggie paused, taking in a breath so as to try not to be annoyed. "You've burned down seven schools because of their choice of teachers."

"You know damn well what the f*ck was wrong with those freaks. The only reason they even got those jobs is because no one cares about children anymore."

"Kill the teachers, not the entire school. Take over the system and hire teachers yourself if you don't like the ones they have."

"Too much work."

"Okay, let's quit before this gets too heated." Charlie chuckled awkwardly at the two. "Remember what happened last time you guys argued?" Vaggie blushed lightly and looked away when she brought that up.

"I don't see the problem. I mean, I hate it when we argue but what's wrong with makeup sex when it's all said and done?" Izuku shrugged it off, getting a sigh out of the princess.

"Theproblemis that last time we had to completely replace several bed sheets, beds, tables, and chairs. We basically had to remodel the rooms because of the mess."

"Like you didn't enjoy it." He chuckled. "But I see your point. Next time we'll go to a motel. Right,chicapicante?" Vaggie blushed harder as she tried hiding behind her hair for cover.

"And we're here!" Charlie quickly yelled as the limo came to a stop. Which resulted in Izuku blitzing out of the vehicle as fast as he could. "Well at least he's excited." She chuckled in amusem*nt.

"Yeah." Vaggie smiled as she watched him walk off. "He really loves the kids so I can see how not being with them can cause him some distress."

"Well, it's part of his charm after all. Just imagine what it's gonna be like the next time we have a baby."

"Oh, don't remind me. You know how crazy he got when Vee was pregnant." She laughed a bit at the memory. "I had to carry a bat to knock him out before things got out of hand."

"You two coming or what?!" He called out from a distance.

"We're coming sweetie!" Charlie laughed as she and Vaggie quickly started to follow him into the station.

The two hurriedly went after him as Razzle and Dazzle drove off to park the car. Meanwhile, the trio have entered the station and are now awaiting for the rest of their party. A loud ding went off as a large set of doors opened up, letting loose a large crowd of hellborn into the station. Despite being a bit taller than a fair bit of the populace it was still hard to see over them.

With a sigh, Izuku raised his hand with small sparks emitting from his fingertips. A few seconds later he fired off a small harmless firework to signal them. Scaring some individuals while others just went about their day.

"Papa!" A small voice called out, revealing a small white haired child with two curved red horns, one of which was broken, rushing through the crowd.

"There's my little Snowball!" He smiled as the child jumped into his arms, laughing and giggling all the way. "Now who's next? Akane? Tilla?"

"Daddy! Mommas!" Another child cried out, this time a small hellhound with gray fur resembling that of a husky dog. Said child also jumped up, landing in Charlie's arms as she let out a surprised squeak.

"There's my fluffy comet!" The princess smiled happily as she started preparing the child with small kisses.

"Dang it! You kids are getting fast!" The voice of a woman yelled as she cut her through the crowd.

A slim, red imp with large curled horns, red eyes with yellow sclera, sharp teeth and black, claw-like fingers. She also had a heart-shaped skull marking on her forehead that seemed to be crossed out. She was dragging some bags behind her as she held a small child in her arms. Said child had white hair and two black horns that had stars on them.

"Hi Dada!" The small child waved happily in her arms.

"Hello my little Superstar!" Izuku smiled as the child reached out for him, to which he did just so and hugged the little one close.

"Good to see you guys are alright." The imp woman smiled as she was suddenly picked up by Vaggie. "Hey!"

"You know you love it, Barb." She smirked as she hugged her tightly.

"You're just jealous that the kids didn't rush to you first." She grumbled but didn't even try to escape her grasp.

"She's right though. Kids, give your mother a hug." He smiled as the three kids were then given to the moth demon. "And now I get you, my sweet little Kitten~"

"Nya~" Barbie purred as she was taken into his arms. The two engage in a tender kiss that lasts a few short moments. "I missed you."

"I missed you more." He smiled with a chuckle as she wrapped her tail around his arm. Clearly meaning he was not letting her go anytime soon.

"Papa and Mama are flirting." Eri pointed out with a small smirk.

"Yes. Yes they are." Vaggie chuckled. "Though we better get going since everyone is staring at us." She said, noticing the looks they were getting from passersby.

"Take a hike dumb dumbs!" Akane growled, not liking the people staring at them.

"Rude but warranted." Izuku let out a dry chuckle as the luggage started floating behind them. "Let's get home before so we can get you all nice and settled."

~Small Time-Skip~

The family has just arrived back home at the Hazbin Hotel, where they finally saw the changed sign. Izuku made a note to talk to Alastor about the unpermitted change to it but decided to not be too harsh since they kinda liked the name. Right now, however, they had all just arrived at the lobby where everyone else had been gathered. Needless to say some individuals were shocked to see the three children and the imp woman who was also a member of their relationship.

"So what you are saying it, that in the seven years you've been down here you already have three kids. And with multiple partners to boot, one of which isn't here right now because she has business elsewhere." Husk said as he tried his best to hide his half empty bottle of whiskey from the kids. "Is there anything else I'm missing?"

"I have an appointment with another colleague later today, a staff meeting tomorrow at an assassination company I work for/sorta own, and I am actually an overlord that runs a string of businesses all around pride."

"Is that it?"

"More or less."

"Aw~ You're so cute!~" Niffty could be heard playing the kids off to the side of the room. Carrying a giggling Tilla who messed with her hair as Akane was getting some zoomies in. "I'm gonna love you all forever and ever!"

"I must say this is quite the shock. Just imagine how many shocked faces there will be if this gets out." Alastor laughed before feeling a slight chill run down his spine. Courtesy of a glare from a very menacing Izuku. Who was still carrying a very calm and happy Barbie Wire.

"I just got here and I don't even get a good chance to be with my cuddle bug? I'm hurt." She said softly with a teasing smirk.

"Then how about you come with me? I can't help but feel that you could use the extraactivities~"

"Oh~ Really?~" She smirked as she wrapped her arms around his neck, giving him a sultry stare right into his eyes. "Color me intrigued~ I can't wait to see what you have cooked up later~"

"Daddy and Mommy are flirting again." Akane said as she finished her energetic zoomies.

"Not even gonna try and hide it? And you call me a pervert." Angel shrugged with a dry laugh as he laid lazily on one of the couches. Occasionally wincing whenever he heard a ding from his phone.

"Does that mean we're getting a little brother?" Eri questioned with a head tilt getting them to freeze instantly.

"E-Eri! Y-you can't just say that!" Charlie stuttered out with a dark blush.

"A-anyway..." Izuku cleared his throat. "Me and Barbie are gonna need to get ready for our outing then. So I hope you'll all watch over them. Except you Al. You stay at least fifty feet away from them." He said, pointing a glare at the strawberry pimp.

"Perfectly fine with me. I still have some prep work for my new studio to install anyhow." He said nonchalantly, walking away from the group while twirling his cane.

"How the fuuuu-fudge do you expect us to keep watch of these kids?" Husk said, nearly swearing but quickly caught himself.

"I don't know, maybe put on a magic show for them." Izuku smirked slightly as Husk simply looked at him blankly.

"Magic?" Akane and Eri were almost instantly at the counter, staring straight at the cat demon expectantly.

"No." He said plainly, getting back to his job.

"Yeah. No need to pester the has-been magician. Pretty sure he's years out of practice anyway." Vaggie spoke co*ckily as the former Vegas star gleamed at her.

"What're you getting at?"

"I mean, she has a point." Charlie mused with a knowing smile. "I mean, you are the bartender after all. We can't really ask you to do much more than your job after all."

"You did say you gave up on magic tricks some time ago." Izuku laughed a bit, joining in on the gag. "I mean, basic parlor tricks aren't much help down here anyway. Except for entertaining kids but I guess maybe you're just not up for it."

"Alright, fine!" He groaned, resigning himself to his fate. The three shared a brief high five in celebration as he pulled out a deck of cards. "Pick a card. Any card." He spoke in a bored tone.

Eri examined the spread of cards carefully. Soon drawing a card from the deck. The ace of spades was her choice. After memorizing the card she placed it back in the deck for Husk to shuffle. A quick minute later he drew the top card from the deck and showed it to them.

"Is this your card?" He questioned rhetorically. And low and behold, it was the ace of spades.

"Woah!" The two girls looked up at him amazed with stars in their eyes. It was enough to make the man smile. If even for a little bit.

"Here's another good one." He said, with a slightly more chipper attitude. Reaching his hand behind Akane's ear, confusing the small hellhound. "And tada!" He pulled out a coin.

"So cool!"

"And like that the kids are at peace." Izuku smiled as he soon walked off to get his supplies. Not before giving his girlfriends a quick kiss on the cheek.

"So where are we going anyway?" Barbie asked, still being carried in his arms.

"The Goetia palace that's located just outside of Imp City." He felt her freeze in shock in his grasp. "We're gonna be tag teaming a princess either before or after she vents to us about random things that's going on with her arranged marriage. Which she shares a mutual hate for with her husband who's obviously gay at first glance who is also having an affair."

"What?" She uttered out in slight shock in confusion.

"We're gonna quote on quote "eat the rich" tonight."

"Oh! So we're getting that bag out tonight?"

"Yes indeedy! It's your favorite isn't it?"

"Are we gonna be using the clamps or the tasers?"

"Probably both."

"What flavor lube?"

"Vanilla."

"Ha! That's the only vanilla thing in any of what we do!"

"I guess that means you want the chains too?"

"Oh f*ck the hell yes!"

~To Be Continued~

Chapter 4: Helluva Boss Pilot

Chapter Text

The team of four, three imps and a hellhound, sat in silence as the clock in the background ticked. Adding to the annoyance of one tall imp who simply grumbled to himself. This being the leader of the team Blitz (the 'O' is silent) with his cohorts Moxxie and Millie along with his daughter (only on paper) Loona.

"Where the f*ck is that kid?!" The failed entertainer screamed in fury as he furiously glared at the ticking clock. "He's an hour late! What in Satan's name is he doing?!" The clock continued to tick in the background before he pulled out his flintlock. "And YOU! Shut up!" he ordered, pulling the trigger and destroying the clock instantly.

"That's the third clock this week, sir." Moxie sighed heavily, getting up from his seat and over to the supply closet. Getting a broom, a dustpan and another clock to hang up.

"f*ck off!"

"Blitz, calm yourself down boy!" Millie yelled in exasperation. "He told us he was going to be late. He said to just have the meeting without him so what's the big deal?"

"No way! I ain't starting sh*t 'till he gets here!" The boss yelled, getting an eye roll from the hound girl who didn't bother looking away from her phone.

*SLAM*

"I LIVE BITCHES!" A voice yelled out as the aforementioned 'kid' entered the room. Drawing their attention, though they did let out a laugh when they saw that his appearance was a bit rough and ready. Clearly something was going on before he got there. Wink, wink.

"Good day everyone. What did I miss?"

"Nothing much, Izuku. Blitz refused to start without you and now he's...uh..." Millie began with a light chuckle.

"Acting like a fool." Moxie finished for his significant other, now having finished setting up the new clock.

"Well screw you too, Mox." The boss growled before pointing an accusatory finger at Izuku. "And where have you been!?"

"I had a very important appointment that I couldn't reschedule. I told you this yesterday." He said as he took a seat beside Loona. Said furry glancing over at him with a small smirk before messing with his hair. Pulling out a few stray white feathers, which luckily went unnoticed by the others.

"Now, are we gonna get started or what?" Izuku asked with a smile, before tuning out most of what was going on since he didn't really care.

"Alright, now, I know business has been... a bit slow lately, yes. It's no one's fault, okay? I'm not naming any names here... Moxxie." Moxxie gives him an incredulous look as he continues. "Now, does anyone have... any bright ideas on how we can get business drummin' up again?"

"What about a car wash?" Millie excitedly asked with a sparkle in her eyes.

"This is Hell, Millie. No one cares about cars being clean here, okay?"

"Speak for yourself boss." Izuku commented with a slightly disgusted expression.

" Ooh, what about a billboard?" Blitz proposed with a subtle shine in his eyes.

"We can't afford a billboard, sir." Moxxie sighed as he rolled his eyes at his theatrics.

"I mean, I can but that doesn't mean I'll do it." Izuku muttered out with a shrug as he drank his coffee.

"Helpful, Moxxie. Really glad you're in the room right now. Have you guys forgotten what service we provide?" Blitz said as he shoved him away. Turning on the nearby TV and showing footage of the group out on a job.

Blitz swung a hammer at one person's head, causing it to crack open. While Moxxie fired a shotgun point blank at another which sent him flying afterwards. Loona was swinging one person around with her teeth by the neck. Millie sliced another target's head clean off with a maniacal laugh. In the background, Izuku was absentmindedly setting his targets on fire while scrolling through his phone.

"Ahh, those were the good times." He said in a nostalgic tone as he brought out a bucket of popcorn to share with the group.

"Popcorn is stale, Blitz. Seriously, how long were you holding onto this?" Izuku questioned as he spit out the old popcorn.

"I don't need any reminding, sir, considering you blew most of our salaries on an obnoxious TV ad last week. One that you then additionally paid to have run for a full three hours on a channel nobody watches."

"And by nobody you mean just us since half the people I know are suckers for romantic comedies." Izuku comments again, getting looks from the others. "What?"

"Uh, hey, excuse me. What's "obnoxious" about a super-fun jingle, all right? It's a fun distraction when an advertisem*nt's spittin' bullsh*t!"

"People love musicals, sir." Millie stated in a matter of fact tone.

"Considering we live in one we don't really have much of a choice."

"Exactly, Millie! And we're basically doin' a musical. Are you gonna crush my musical theater dreams like my dad did?"

"Sir–"

"'Cause right now, all I see is just my dad's asshole talking to me! Crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside." He continued with the dramatic display.

"Are you tryin' to crush his dreams, Moxxie?" Millie asked in a playful tone

"I-- What?" He looked over to his wife in slight confusion.

"I thought I knew you." She seductively stuck her tongue out at him, making him blush.

"Who are you and what have you done with the adorable Mox-Mox I know and adore?~" Izuku joined in, speaking in an exaggerated worried tone.

"I can't believe you, Moxxie, after I made you employee of the month!" Blitz cried out as he pulled out a picture of Moxxie, which was not at all flattering, that was labeled as such.

"Okay, sir!" Moxxie cut into the bit with a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry, a commercial jingle is not comparable to musical theater. Nobody actually likes the jingles!"

"I liked it." Millie said, getting her husband to shake as he pointed to her.

"Do not-- Do not agree with him in front of me!"

"Wait? Are you saying you don't like my singing, Mox?" Izuku raised an eyebrow, making the smaller imp look away slightly.

"N-no! I love you singing!" Moxxie panicked before taking a quick breath to calm himself.

"I'd like to go on record and say that incident was Loona's fault. Dispatch is supposed to give us the right info on the target. It's very simple." He looked over at the Gothic dressed hellhound, who was sitting right across from him while looking at her phone. Which had a bunch of images of Moxxie being tortured in multiple different ways. Including explosions, crushing, stabbing, etc.

"Oh, sit on a dick, Moxxie." She said, not even to turn to look at him.

"Oh, trust me." Izuku giggled in his seat. "He does that just fine."

"YOU sit! Sit on...a...and the... d-- DO YOUR JOB!!" He scrambled to say, fighting off a blush from Izuku's previous comment.

"Hey, now, we don't blame our screw ups on Loona, okay?! She didn't do anything wrong~" He said as he began affectionately nuzzling her. To which she responded with a threatening growl.

"Are you kidding me, sir? She's awful!"

"C'mon, Mox. She ain't that bad."

~Flashback 1~

"Hello, I.M.P." Loona answered the company phone while looking at a Hellhound Monthly magazine.

"Loona, I got stabbed! Call Mox–"

Loona didn't care to listen any further and hung up the call. Meanwhile, Izuku walked in confused.

"Was that a client?"

"No idea." She said plainly before turning to show Izuku a page in her magazine. More specifically, a page for child hellhound products. "You think Akane will like the dress or the choker better? Maybe both?"

~Flashback 2~

"Happy Adoption Anniversary, Loonie! I got you a little somethin'." He said happily as he presented his adopted daughter with a wrapped gift.

"Is it a cure for syphilis?" She asked with a narrowed glare.

"I... Oh..." Blitz looked away awkwardly.

"THEN I DON'T WANT IT!!" She yelled as she grabbed the box and threw it to the ground. Releasing the contents that crawled all over her. "UGHHH!!"

"I'm sorry! It was spiders!" Blitz yelled out as he somehow got outside and was looking in from a window.

"Goddammit." She grumbled as she started feeling a bit warm. Looking over she found Izuku standing beside her with the flames killing the spiders.

"So you have syphilis?" He quirked an eyebrow as she looked away slightly. "Come on." He said as he grabbed her hand, a portal opening in the path.

"Where are we going?"

"Sloth so you can get some actual help." He said as the portal closed behind them.

~Flashback 3~

"Um, e-excuse me. Did you just fax me an ad for weight loss?" Moxxie asked, holding a flier for "Chub-B-Gone".

"No." She spoke uncaringly as she watched Charlie's performance on her computer.

"Wha-- Why- Why would anyone send me this?" Moxxie said in confusion.

"C'mon... You know why."

"Don't worry, Mox. You're fine." Izuku said, appearing right behind him, giving the small imp a shiver. "Besides, I think this is a bit better than what she sent me." He said, showing him a piece of paper.

"What the unholy crap?!" His face turned a bright neon red as he turned away from the sight. A faint drizzle of blood coming from his nose as he did so.

~Flashback 4~

"Whoever left the f*cking... avocado salad in the fridge, I'm taking it, because I have the worst hangover right now!" Loona groaned as she fished the box out of the fridge. Tearing off the lid and drinking, yes DRINKING, the salad.

"Why would you drink on a work night?" Millie questioned as she watched her.

"I'm hungover from this morning, dumbass!"

"You really need to learn about moderation, Loonie." Izuku commented as he stirred a cup of tea.

"Isn't that my lunch?" Moxxie questioned as he walked into the room.

"I brought extra so I can share with you, Mox."

"Y'know what?! I can't take this assault right now! I need to blow off some f*cking steam!" She yelled as she kicked the box at Moxxie, sending him flying.

"AAAAAAAAAAH!" She screamed as she ran into the street and kicked away a baby in a stroller with the mother looking shocked and horrified.

Soon the stroller was floating back towards the woman who sighed in relief as she hugged her baby protectively. Izuku stared at the sight from the window with a content smile on his face.

~Flashback 5~

"Blitz, that clingy, rich asshole is on the phone! Says it's urgent and wants to talk to you!" Loona called out, staring at the three men who were standing by the water tank. "Sounds a little DTF-y."

"Oh, GOD, it was ONE TIME!" He complained as he threw his cup to the ground.

"If I hadn't slept with that privileged asshole, none of us would have access to the living world."

"...You what?" Moxxie looked at him with a deadpan.

"I second that." Izuku stared blankly at his boss as he slowly slipped his drink.

~Flashback within a flashback so we'll just call this "Flashback 5.5" or something~

"Got the book, got the book! Got this f*ckin' heavy book!" Blitz whispered to himself as he snuck towards the balcony, leaving behind a sleeping owl demon who was hooting as he slept. He climbed onto the railing only for the book to slip, dragging him down with it. "Oh- Oh, sh*t!"

He fell straight down onto the table and in a massive cake, or pudding I guess you call it since they seem to be British. Surrounded by a small group of other bird demons, including the "clingy rich asshole's" wife, Stella and Izuku who was with them. All of them getting covered in cake and frosting.

"Sorry, I f*cked your husband." He said before he quickly began running away from the group. Really fast since he noticed Izuku was looking really f*cking pissed.

~Flashback 5.5 End~

"It took me four hours to make that dessert, Blitz. FOUR HOURS!" He crushed his cup in his hand before it melted.

"Four hours?" Moxxie raise an eyebrow as he handed him a new cup.

"It would've been about two and a half but Eri and Akane really wanted to help and you know I can't really say no to them"

"Aww~"

"BLITZ!" Loona yelled again to refocus their attention.

"I HEARD YOU ALREA--!" He screamed back at her before transitioning to his office where he was now speaking with the privileged asshole. "Soooo, what can I do for you this time, Stolas?"

"There's a political candidate causing trouble up on Earth for a few of my associates. He's trying to convince people global warming exists!"

"Doesn't it?"

"Well, yes, but more people die if nothing is done about it. And it gets lonely here~"

"Okay, well, yeah, that makes sense."

"You know what happens when I'm lonely, Blitzy?~"

"Oh, god-f*ckin'-damnit." He muttered to himself, grimacing in what was about to come.

"When I'm lonely, I become hungry. And when I become hungry, I want to choke on that red **** of yours... **** your ***** and lick all of your *****, before taking out your *****, and **** with more teeth until you're screaming ********** like a f*ckING baby--!"

Blitz hung up the phone, which had Stolas's caller ID fittingly as "Creepy Mouth (aka one night stand bird dick)". He then proceeded to snap his phone in half, crush it into pieces using his office phone, and blend those pieces with a blender in his office into a smooth puree.

"Eat this!" He said, handing the thing to Loona who was standing right next to him meaning she probably heard the whole thing. Either way she still ate the phone smoothie for some reason. "And then y'know that bridge over the freeway?"

"Yeah?" He questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"Bring the kid with you, sh*t off it, and have him set that sh*t on fire!"

"Leave me out of this!" He called out from the other room.

"I'll pay you extra!"

"C'mon, Loona! We'll get some food while we're out!"

~End of Flashbacks~

"Look, the point is, Loona is a valued member of our family, and we don't get rid of family." Blitz stated, not noticing that Loona, seemingly touched by his remark, smiled softly.

"We aren't a family, sir! You are the boss! We are the employees! You treat her like she's some troubled teenager!" Moxxie exclaimed as Loona slowly flipped him the bird as he spoke. "She's more like a meth-addicted homeless woman you let man the phones!"

"That is offensive! Without homeless people, I wouldn't have HALF the joy and laughter I do in this life!" He pressed his face against the window glancing down at a homeless imp with a sign that read "Monee Helps, Satan Bless" with a succubus on her phone glaring at the poor man.

Blitz simply waved down with a smug grin on his face. Izuku, seeing this, used his flames to float down a small pack filled with some nonperishable snacks they had on hand and some extra cash he had on him. The imp seeing the pack looked up at Izuku who simply smiled with a wave. The homeless imp had small tears in his eyes as he mouthed his thanks to him.

"While we're on the subject of "family", can you stop finding me and Millie outside of work" Moxxie complained as he facepalmed.

"Come on, sweetie! It's not that big a deal!" Millie said in a comforting tone as she shrugged it off.

"Excuse me... WHAT?!"

~Flashback 6 (I guess)~

"Honey, can you get me the butter?" Moxxie called out as he was busy making dinner.

"Sure, sweetie." She opened the fridge, immediately gaining a shocked expression.

"Spoiler alert: the butter's spoiled!" Blitz said as he tossed a glob of butter into her hands. To which she awkwardly giggled.

"What's funny, honey?" Moxxie asked, confused as he put some carrots in the soup (or whatever it was supposed to be).

"Really impressive wordplay." Blitz said as he smiled "cutely" from inside the fridge.

"WHAT THE--?! WHY ARE YOU IN OUR FRIDGE?!?!"

"Okay, we're here now!" Izuku called out as he walked into the kitchen with Charlie and Vaggie behind him carrying a couple of boxes with them.

"And we brought gifts!" Charlie said excitedly as she bounced around in excitement.

"Why is there someone in the fridge?" Vaggie question in a bored tone.

"Oh, I'm joining your guys' date or whatever f*ck fest this is."

"No you're not." Izuku said as he closed the fridge and dragged it out of the kitchen.

Chapter 5: ~Murder Family~

Chapter Text

"I was a good person, before it all went down... I was good my entire life."

We open our scene upon the little red school house called Puppies Junior School. Birds fly in the background. "Learning is fun" is written on the side of the building. There are trees and a playground. A bell on the roof rings. The classroom curtains are opened, revealing two birds singing on a tree branch. Inside the classroom, the teacher quickly writes "Good morning!" on the blackboard.

"Good morning!" Sang a slim, tan-skinned woman with both sandy-green eyes and sandy-blonde waist-length hair which is more fluffy and curly at the lower portion who twirled happily to look upon her eager class.

"I hope you all did your homework!" She greeted, looking over the smiling students, nodding in a dance at their desks. A brown-haired boy wearing a dunce cap spins on a stool and faces the wall.

♫ We love to do our homework, and we love our teacher, too! ♫

♫ Then, when I throw out these fun questions, you should know just what to do! ♫

♫ Okay! ♫

♫ Two plus six is... ♫

♫ Eight! ♫

♫ And good behavior's... ♫

♫ Great! ♫

♫ And now, it's that part of the class when we say the time of day and date! ♫

♫ It's nine in the morning... ♫

♫ On January 8th! ♫

♫ The sun is out smiling! ♫

♫ And it's your husband's birthday! ♫

With that one declaration from the dunce boy, a series of unavoidable events had begun its course. The class continues to sings "la la la" while Mrs. Mayberry faces the board. She drags her piece of chalk in a line on the board, the piece almost gone. Her face is beaded with sweat and her eye twitches.

"Oh my stars! Stop singing, children! Hush up, now!" Her panicked declaration quickly shut them up as she leaned against her desk with a look of worry and guilt. "I forgot it's my husband's birthday! I didn't get him anything special!"

"Maybe if we call him, we could do a happy birthday surprise!" One of the students suggested joyfully.

Scene cuts to a bedroom. "Wifey" appears with a ringing telephone icon on a computer screen. A sock lands on a corner of the computer followed by a pair of underwear. Giggles and an "Oh, yeah!" and "Not there, not there-" come from the room. An unused condom hits the screen and accepts the video call as Mrs. Mayberry's face appears from the other, while the sound of a squeaking bed is heard.

Back in the classroom, her face turns red in anger and then shock as she stares in bewilderment. The children stand behind her with concerned, fearful looks. Her face blank and in shadow, Mrs. Mayberry stands up and walks away.

"Wait! Mrs. Mayberry!" One of the children grabs her hand in an attempt to stop her. "Remember what you taught us? Think before you act."

Mrs. Mayberry grabs hold of the girl's neck and tosses her through the roof. She walks out the door. The children scurry to the window to see Mrs. Mayberry drive through a white picket fence in her green car. The children head back to the computer to watch.

"Okay-" The sound of a door slamming opened caught him by surprise. "Oh, sh*t! Sweetie, what are you doing here?"

"Shut up, Jarold!" Mrs. Mayberry screamed at her, soon to be, ex-husband. Followed by the sounds of a woman's screams and the whirring of a chainsaw. "You scream like a bitch!" She yelled at the mystery harlot. The sounds of a gunshot catching their ears.

Dunce boy cowers in his seat as the sound of a chainsaw is heard. Blood splatters against the computer screen as the children stare in horror. Yet the students didn't look away from the mess that had unfolded.

"Oh, god! What have you done? Sh-She had a family!" Jarold cried out in horror

"We could've had a family!" Mayberry sobbed as she co*cked her gun. Gunshots are heard and several children look away in disgust. Mrs. Mayberry wipes away the blood from the screen. She looks frazzled at her students.

"Oh, dear God. What have I done...? In front of you all!" Tears began streaming down her face as she could not bear to see the faces of the students she held so dearly. "I'm so sorry, my children! Don't forget to work on your times tables!"

One final gunshot rang out of the computer's speakers. One by one, each of the children who witnessed the traumatic display fell to the ground unconscious. Surely to be haunted by this for years to come.

"You do everything right in life, play by all the rules... and still get sent down here with all the Hitlers and Epsteins of the world!"

The camera lowers to show a pipe and fossils underground, followed by hanging stalactites. The camera stops at the outside of the I.M.P. building. A shot of the door reads " with "Meeting in progress :)" on a taped piece of paper. Blitzo is seen on his office chair looking bored as a shadow silhouette of Mrs. Mayberry paces the room.

"After one measly massacre propelled by blind rage. So, that's why I'm here..." Mrs. Mayberry turns steps out of the shadows, showing off her new demonic form as he huffs a puff of her cigarette. "To get my revenge."

"I mean, was she hotter?" Blitz asked boredly because he clearly doesn't care about the situation. The women glaring at him angrily as he did so. "I'm just saying, I had a hard time understanding the unprompted melodrama you just spat at me, tit*." He smirks at her, making her seethe in anger as her hair glows a fiery red.

"Anywayyyy, I don't think you quite understand how we're operating down here." Blitz stands up and Mrs. Mayberry continues to glare at him. "See, we take revenge on the living, and it sounds like the core cast of your sitcom of death..." Mayberry barely contains her rage at the imp as he keeps on talking. "...frankly are all probably down here in Hell with you. Boop!" He boops her snoot like you would a little pup but that angers her even more.

"Not... all of them. That whor* survived." She clenched her claws and tossed away her cigarette. "Now, they all call her a hero."

We zoom in on a standard nuclear family in a hospital room, surrounded by bouquets and gifts galore as the mother is wrapped in bandages. New reporters gathered around them in hopes to get a word from the new "hero" of the day.

"How does it feel to have survived such a crazy bitch?" Asked a news reporter who will most like;y be fired later on for her foul language on public television. Unless her throat game is on point that is. It probably is.

"I just hope that sick woman finally found peace." Blonde whor*, Martha, said feigning an aura of innocence around her.

"You are so brave. Here's two million dollars!" The same news reporter who liely sucks off her boss to keep her job hands the family a glistening golden check. Making Martha's eyes sparkle.

"Ohhh! Thank you!" Martha smiled innocently as the cameras flashed.

The scene transitioned to a photo of Martha standing with her husband Ralphie and their two children in front of a house by a lake, surrounded by a picket fence.

"Between the talk shows and the donation bullsh*t, she made so much goddamn cash... getting shot was the best thing to happen to her."

Scene cuts to Martha standing at a podium with "VNN" on it. A news reporter holds out a microphone among several other microphones.

"You're a hero!"

Martha is then seen jogging with a dark-skinned woman with blonde hair.

"You're a hero, girl!"

In a grocery store, a boy wearing a beaver-skin cap talks with a cashier named Brook.

"My mama's a hero!"

"She is a hero!"

Ralphie and Martha have sex in a bedroom and he grunts in pleasure.

"You're a hero!"

An old priest is seen with his hands folded in prayer by church doors. Martha stands next to him with her hands folded.

"You're a herooo!"

Martha is then seen standing at the front of Mrs. Mayberry's old classroom. Another teacher introduces Martha to the class. "How to deal with trauma 101" is written on the board.

"You're a hero!"

Martha smiles as she is given anal sex from another man.

"You're a hero!"

Back in Hell, Mrs. Mayberry's purple fists create cracks on Blitzo's desk as she smashes down on it.

"SHE IS NOT A HEROOOOOO!" She snarled loudly with her voice echoing in the office. She leans in close to Blitz's face, her face red with anger.

Mm-hmm. Yeah! Okay, yeah, my thoughts exactly." He simpoly nods, frightened by the woman before him who is just looking for blood.

He sneaks his hand below his desk as he rapidly presses a red button from underneath his desk. A red light flashes by a label reading "Deranged client." The other labels read "More coffee," "Soiled my pants," "Horny client," "Client giving birth," "Ghost," "Stolas," and "IZUKU'S PISSED!!!!! HELP!!!!!" .

Unfortunately, the crew doesn't notice the distress. Moxxie, who is holding a black and red crossbow in his hands. In front of him is a picture of a smiling family: a father, a mother, a baby and two children. His arms are shaking as the pointer hovers around the man's crotch area.

"Moxxie, stop shakin'! You're gonna shoot our boyfriend!" His wife, Millie, says as she gestures across the room.

Izuku is seated on the gray couch across from them, holding the picture up in one hand. Loona was scrolling through her phone boredly with her head on Izuku's lap, who was petting her with his free hand. On the wall are drawings of Blitzo in a horse shape and a drawing of Robo Fizz with an arrow sticking out from it.

"Wow. I feel soooo loved here." Loona said sarcastically with a deadpan, not even looking away from her phone.

"Awe~ Don't worry Looney~" Izuku cooed as he tickled her behind the ears. "She just knows that I'd protect you." She blushed lightly but tried to hide it. "But in all seriousness, Mox, I'm always willing to take shots from you but I think arrows aren't really what I meant."

"Please stop..." The smaller imp male blushed as his wife giggled beside him.

"Just take a deep breath and let it out!" She demonstrated the action for him.

"But...It's a family! Under what circ*mstances would we ever need to kill a human family?"

"I mean, if that's what the client wants." Millie shrugs, not really seeing the problem with the situation.

"Maybe like a sh*tty dad. Or a mob family. That's understandable." He speaks in a stereotypical Italian accent before shifting back to normal. "But to eradicate an entire innocent—seemingly, in this instance—upper middle class family bloodline?"

"I get what you mean, Mox. The parents I'd probably wouldn't have a problem with. They had their chance but they f*cked it up." Izuku says as he eyes the picture for a bit. "But the kids are where I'd put my foot down. They're young and impressionable, they could amount to something if given the chance."

"Exactly!" Moxxie smiled happily with having at least one person on his side.

"But..." Izuku begins, to which Moxxie becomes slightly disheartened. "No family is this happy, and if they are, they are definitely hiding something."

"You don't know they're innocent!" Loona sits up from Izuku's lap, getting their attention. "This kid probably sets dogs on fire,maybe this girl gets off on bullying Australian kids online, and this guy..." She glares intensely at the father. "This guy definitely watches."

"And for all we know those kids aren't even his." Izuku shifts his gaze to mother. "The son could be the mailman's, daughter could be from her husband's stepfather, and the infant for all we know come from her brother."

"What was with that scenario?" Loona quirked an eyebrow at him curiously.

"Blame the sh*t that Vox puts on TV these days." He let out a heavy annoyed sigh. "Seriously? What happened to all the good shows that actually had effort behind it? Nowadays it's all the same show with different skins!"

"Listen hun, humans are full of secret nasties. It's why so many of them end up down here in the first place." She quickly turns over to smile at Izuku who raises a brow at her. "No offense though."

"I'll get back at you later."

"But—" Moxxie begins to speak again, only to be silenced by his wife cupping his cheeks. And I mean his face not his ass you perverts!

"Guilty and innocent aren't our business, Mox. Killin' who we're paid to is our business." She emphasizes her point by making him mouth it with her. "Shoot the target." She gives him a quick peck to the lips.

"If you make the shot I'll let you choose the position we're in next time." Izuku winks at him, making him blush again. "Sorry Mox, you are just too cute sometimes."

"There is a time and a place for flirting, Izzy." Millie deadpans slightly at his antics.

"And that's anywhere and anytime, Pumpkin~" He playfully sticks his tongue out at her, to which she lets out a small giggle. "Either way Mox, just take the shot before hijinks ensue."

"I just think it's a bit excessive, and we could be a bit more selective, is all." He says as he starts to aim his crossbow again.

"Guys! I want you to meet—" Blitz barged into the room, slamming teh door open. Causing Moxxie to accidentally fire an arrow.

The arrow ricochets around the room. Millie jumps into Moxxie's arms as the arrow hits a computer. The arrow then flies and creates a hole in the family picture that a stunned Izuku is holding as Loona ducks under his arm for protection. The arrow hits the bottom of a tank with eels and the tank starts to wobble dangerously. The arrow flies toward Mrs. Mayberry, but Blitz catches it with one hand.

"...our newest client!" Blitz finished before the tank fell over, causing the eels to spill onto the floor. Letting out a burst of electricity that set the room on fire. "Damn it, Moxxie! I just bought those eels!"

"Oh, dear Satan." Izuku groans before snapping his fingers. Instantly, the fires were put out but unfortunately the damage had already been done.

"Good work, kid!" Blitz gave a small applause. "Now, does anyone know if we have insurance or not? Because I am not paying for one of Moxxie's screw ups!"

"I'll make some calls." Izuku sighs again as he pulls out his phone. His attention turned to their client as he did so. "You want me to call a taxi while I'm at it or would you like to stay in the waiting room, miss..."

"Mayberry." She introduces offering a handshake which he returns. "And I think I'll take up the offer to stay in the waiting room."

"Alrighty then. Feel free to help yourself to our complimentary snacks and beverages. I do believe there should be some muffins left that I baked this morning." He says as he leads her to another room and opens the door for her.

"Such a gentleman." She smiled as she went in and took a seat inside.

"And, don't worry, we'll get that skan* in less than twenty-four hours or your first kill is free!" Blitz called out from across the room. "And when do we get a waiting room for clients? And free sh*t to give them?"

"When I decided it would be good for impressions."

"Also, when did we start implementing that deal?" Moxxie spoke up, getting a glare from his boss who angrily grabs his face.

"When you almost set fire to my office in front of a CLIENT, YOU f*ckIN' DIPsh*t!!" Blitz pushes him away. "Now, someone PLEASE tell me that fancy book is still intact!"

"You mean... our only ticket to the other side?" Loona doesn't look up from her phone as she pulls out the grimoire. "Yeah. Got it."

"And that's why you're my favorite, Loonie." Blitz smiles affectionately at his adopted daughter and pulls out a dog biscuit. "You get a tweat, now!" He says in a baby talk voice as he holds it up to her.

"Ew. Stop." She grimaces as Blitz throws the treat into the air and catches it with his tongue, like a frog. He pulls it into his mouth and chews. "You're so gross!"

Loona opens the book to use the spell as Millie draws a pentagram with chalk on the wall. It glows red and creates a portal to the human world.

"Awwww, stop it. I get enough of that from my therapist."

"You need therapy." Izuku points out in a flat tone as Loona rolls her eyes and leaves.

"Now, let's go lick some ass!" Blitz puts his hand on Moxxie's face, who struggles to walk to Millie.

"The expression is "kick some ass"... Blitzo." Millie snaps her fingers at Blitzo as she walks through the portal.

"I didn't hear you complaining the other day, Mills." Izuku chuckled as he followed behind with Blitz right behind him.

"Mine's better."

Aww, fuuuck..." Moxxie groans as he walks through the portal.

All three imps and young demon stand in front of a small red house by the lake as the sun sets. Izuku let out a small whistle at the view before following behind the rest of the crew. Sneaking their way across the lawn and toward a large window on the th side of the house.

"That's gotta be her." Blitz chuckles darkly as he peers through the window. "This is too easy. Moxxie, do you want this one?"

"Me?" Moxxie says, pleasantly surprised and excited to be able to get the target this time.

"Yeaaaah, this one's simple enough for you to handle." He speaks as Moxxie stands up and peers through the window. His face falls as he looks at the family having dinner. "It's just a happy mother who just got out of the hospital."

Martha and Ralphie affectionately rub each other's noses. Martha holds a dinner platter in her hand. Moxxie hesitates at the window. Izuku peers in to take a look as well before letting out a slight sweatdrop as he looks into the dining room.

"You snooze, you lose, Mox!" Blitz sneers as he pulls out his rifle. Martha's face is seen in a reflector, her doe eyes wide and blinking innocently. "Aaaand I've got ya, bitch." He smiles monstrously as he readies the shot.

"Wait... Are we actually killing a family?!"

"No, don't be a puss. We're just killing a mother." Blitz says as he positions his rifle. "We're ruining a family!" His rifle clicks as he is about to fire.

"But... Ho- Hold on, hold on! Let's just think about it." Moxxie lifts up Blitz's gun as he fires. The bullet hits a glass mirror inside the house. All four family members gasp in fear.

"What was that, Ralphie?"

"I dunno, Martha! But, whatever it is..." Ralphie grins evilly as he stands up holding a rifle in his hands. "...they're gonna be tomorrow night's dinner!

Martha sets the platter on the table and pulls out another rifle. She drinks a glass of wine and smashes it onto the floor.

"Alright, kids! Guns out!"

The boy pulls out a small gun from his beaver-skin hat. The girl pulls out another rifle. All of them have evil grins of sharp teeth.

"Looks like we got some rabbits to catch, young'uns!" Ralphie smirks as he gets closure to the window with his kin in tow.

Meanwhile, Blitz is fuming in anger as Moxxie starts looking about ready to have another panic attack. Izuku gulps nervously as he is trying to alert the other about what's happening.

"What the f*ck was that, Moxxie?!" Blitz yells as Moxxie wheezes anxiously, eye twitching. He lets out a croak with his snake-like tongue out. He then falls to his knees, hands over his face.

"Guys..." Izuku speaks softly as he ducks down.

"I'm sorry. They just seemed so wholesome and happy." Tears fall from Moxxie's eyes as he takes more breaths. "I panicked!"

"Guys...!"

"Oh, who the f*ck is innocent, Moxxie?!" Blitz facepalms at his employee's stupidity. "From the moment of birth, you're already a parasite leeching off your momma's tit*! Get the f*ck over yourself, you baby dick prune!"

"GUYS!!!"

"WHAT!!!" The three look at him.

"We're in Texas!!!" The moment he said this a blast shot through the wall and hit Blitzo in the arm, black blood flying out.

"AAAAH! A new hole! SCATTER!"

Izuku, Blitz and Millie flee the scene and Moxxie hides in the bushes. Another hole appears and part of the wall explodes. Ralphie and Martha grin and leap through the large hole with guns drawn. Moxxie peers out from the bushes and rapidly looks around. A child's hand grabs Moxxie by his tail and he yelps.

Ralphie gives chase after Millie. Missing several shots as she backflips onto a small dock and dives into the pond. Growling in annoyance, he makes his way to the shallow waters with a glass bottle hand.

"Where'd you go, little critter?! Y'all can't hide long from me!"

Millie is seen with her head above the water under the dock. A knife is in her mouth. Millie breaks through the dock and lands on it, with her knife and a grin. Ralphie swings a glass bottle and Millie runs behind him out of the way. Millie jumps up in the air, knife in both hands. Ralphie swings his bottle upwards, knocking Millie in the head. She cries out and falls to the ground. She struggles to stand, but collapses onto the dock. Her eyes twitch. Ralphie smiles evilly down at her as the cloudy sky spirals red.

Moxxie opens his eyes and gasps with a squeak to find himself tied to a stitched up dead body in a chair. Moxxie's face falls in fear as he looks at the girl and boy. Both their eyes are red and devious sharp grins form on their faces.

"Oh! Well, hello there, little ones. Aren't you cute?" Moxxie says as he tries to defuse the situation.

"It's nice to have a new critter to play with." The children spoke eerily, the boy finishing a moment after the girl.

Moxxie glances up in fear at a red light above him. The light reveals a human head high up and several limbs on plaques. The wooden walls are stained with red blood. Two plaques hold stitched up faces of skin. A larger plaque displays a dead man with long white hair, arms crossed, eyes and teeth bulging out. His upper chest is connected to the plaque. A picture frame made of bones reveals another face made of skin inside it. Human skin is tacked to the wall with "Bless this mess" stitched onto it. Moxxie looks and sees a dead human body on a platter in front of him, an apple in the human's mouth. Organs are in a nearby bowl.

"Ohhhhh... crumbs." It was at this moment he knew just how bad he f*cked up.

The scene cuts to four gunshots ringing out in the woods. Blitz dashes through a bush. Martha's evil laughter follows as Blitz runs through the forest. He slides down a hill and catches his breath at the bottom. The cold air reached his lungs making him shiver in the dead of night.

"I know you're hurtin', little devil!" Martha sang with mad glee as she walked through the dark forest.

Blitz takes deep breaths as he leans against a tree. His eyes go wide as he covers his mouth. A silhouette of Martha is shown walking through the woods.

"I promise, that I can make that pain go real quick! Just come let Mama Martha put a bullet in your pretty little skull!" Her voice echoed through the woods as she seemingly walked away.

Blitz sighs in relief before his phone lets out a yelling ringtone. Blitz pulls out the yellow cell phone and it flips through the air. The phone has "GFY" written on it with a laughing devil emoji on it. He grumbles in annoyance as he saw just who would call him at such a bad time.

"Dammit!" He nearly through his phone away but caught it just in time to answer. "Stolas! This is a really bad time! Call later, asshole!"

Stolas is shown relaxing in a bathtub. There are candles with blue flames around the tub. The floor has glowing astrological symbols on it. The curtains look like the starry night sky. Glowing constellations float around the room. Stolas holds an old rotary phone to his ear, in the shape of sunflowers.

"Mmmmm, when isn't it a bad time, Blitzy?" He smiled playfully as he sank into the waters. Watching what was happening through the bubbles floating from his bath,

"What is it?" Blitz asked in frustration.

"I've been meaning to follow up on our last little conversation regarding my grimoire?"

"What did you just call me?!" Blitz questioned angrily as Stolas popped a bubble that had his visage in it.

"My book, Blitzy. The book I was given to do my job? That I have allowed you to use to do yours?"

Blitz looks scared as a rifle clicks. A bullet flies through the tree where Blitzo was moments before. A shadow of Martha with red eyes and mouth appears through the hole. Causing him to remember this was not the time or place for this sh*t.

"I can HEAR you, darlin'!" Martha's glow red eyes shined evilly.

"Shhhit!" He quickly ran away in terror all the while Stolas could give a sh*t and a half and continued talking. I guess he has faith in Blitzy but who knows.

"Anywhooo, I have been thinking. You know, I have been... permitting you to access the mortal realm less than... legally for quite some time now, but I do need it back to fulfill my duties. I was thinking, what if we worked out some kind of exchange? Favors for favors?"

Stolas runs his finger on the edge of the tub. He makes walking motions with his fingers as they begin to glow red. All the while, Blitz ran through the woods in order to find cover. A bullet hits a tree and Blitzo quickly ducks behind another one.

"Doesn't that sound...enticing?"

"You gotta stop using your fancy ass rich people talk, okay? I'm trying to concentrate on not getting f*cked in my A!" He screams, clearly not wanting to deal with any of this crap right now. Or ever. Especially when a bullet is fired and hits the other side of the tree he was hiding behind.

"Then, let me keep it simple: Once a month, on the full moon, you return the book to me, followed by a night of..." Stolas' eyes glow red and he lowers himself into the water with a lustful look. "...passionate fornication~" He leans over the edge of his bath with water spilling out. "And you get to keep it all the rest of the time, hmm? Sounds fair, my little Imp?"

"Fine! Whatever!"

"Ohhh, Blitzo! I'm so excited! I cannot wait to feel your slimy (bleeped) inside of my (bleeped). To (bleeped) the—"

Blitzo cringes and closes his eyes as Stolas rambles on about his lust for Blitzo. The butt of a shotgun is quickly jammed at his throat, causing him to drop his phone. Stolas' continued rambles are heard in the background.

"Gotcha! So, you're a little devil, huh? Come to drag me and my kin to Hell? Well... NOT TODAY, SATAN!" She presses the gun harder into Blitzo. "Gonna send y'all back where ya came from!"

The scene shifts to Moxxie, who struggles to free himself from the rope, his hands tied behind his back. He looks up and gasps as he sees fires being lit from outside. A hangman's noose hangs from the wall.

"Millie!" He shouts, worry starting to set in for his friends and loved ones.

Both kids stare at Moxxie with wide evil grins. Moxxie grunts and struggles again. He notices the girl pull out a sharp knife. He looks at the blade and then glares with determination. The girl raises the knife and aims to kill him. But before she could use it, a faint sound of whistling was heard. Making the children shiver in fear as Moxxie breaths a slight sigh of relief.

"̵̧̺͍̝̓̋͗̉̀͜Ẅ̴͙̙́̌̄͆̚h̴̢̬͎̙̪̉̎̄̿͘o̸̙̞̫͛̀̓̆̿ ̶͎̑̈̍͘̕d̴̝̳̈̔̀a̷̳͚̤̳͛̄r̴̮͑̕e̷̡̝͔͈̓̾͛́s̶͔͂̈́̆̚ ̶͕̰͌̒͠ţ̵̰̾r̷͍̃̐͘y̶̳̌̆ ̷̯͉̻̑́a̵͖̖̦͖̪͒̽̚n̷̞͚̏ď̵̨̢̛͖̳̋̐͝ ̸͍͎͉̤̖̋̚h̵͖̻͌́͋̑͗a̶̛̛̲̲͚̣̟̐͗r̵̝̖̱͓̔̊͜m̸͖̠̣̭̙̈́ ̸̟̻̊m̸̝̰̀̎ÿ̷̧̤̱̝́ ̸̻̓̽̔̚s̴̫̜̞̊ẃ̷̡͕̖̭e̴͇̻͍̪͌̆̇ê̵̱̩t̸̝̹͍͚̎͜ ̷͚͋̽ș̷̜͓̟̑̀͑̽͠k̵̺͙̳̃̓ị̴̬̻̿̏̔̏̚t̶̹̺̦͒ṭ̶͓͚̲̀̒͠i̷̹̦̳̇͋͛̌̚s̵̡̖̳̝̏̐̓̔͝ḧ̷͚̠́͊̃̍ ̴̘̜͔̼̣̌̀l̶̙͍͐̇ị̷͆t̷̛̳͆̅̎͋t̸̯͖͈̓̔͆̈́ļ̵͇̼̗͍̎̈́é̸̫͍̞̈́̏͝ ̶̲̎̕b̸̝̭̱͖̈́u̵͔͊̑͌̃n̶̖̟͇̎̆̉́͜ň̶̦̯̯͘͝y̸̢͙͇̿̚?̶̝̯̞̮̅͊̿͠"̷̧̭͚̮̟̊̓́

A demonic voice sent chills down their spines as the candles that dimly lit the room glowed a bright azure blue. The flames spurting into a blaze that blinded them. In that moment the two were knocked out and tied up instantly. Izuku appeared from the flames and quickie went to untie Mox.

"Thanks Izuku." He smiled slightly as he was handed a rifle.

"You can thank me later." Izuku grabs hold of a chair and throws it through the wall. "Now let's go save our girl!"

"Right!"

They race outside through the forest, where red symbols hang from tree branches. There are torches in rows and tents. A full moon appears in the sky. The camera pans down to reveal Millie and Blitz tied to a stake decorated with spikes at the top. Ralphie laughs as he pours gasoline on the ground under their feet. Nearby, a grinning Martha holds a torch in her left hand.

"I had that f*cking shot. God dammit, Moxxie!" Blitz growled, thinking of ways he's gonna get back at him without firing him because lets face it he can't fire Moxxie. Both for plot and the fact he'd also lose another two employees as well. "And where the f*ck is that damn kid?!"

"Oh, you don't need to worry about your little friends." Martha wears skull earrings, jeans and a low-cut shirt with polka dots. Her eyes are red and her hair is thick and blonde. She spoke with a sickening smile as she carried a torch with her. "They'll join you two as soon as our youngins are done playing."

She laughs horsley as her husband finishes gathering tinder around the two imps. The couple smiling widely with their fangs on full display.

"Satan! We return your FILTHY creatures back to the pits of Hell!" Martha raises her torch as Blitzo and Millie struggle to free themselves. "May the root of evil remain honored as we continue thy WORK!"

Martha grunts as she tosses the torch to the ground, where it lands under Blitzo and Millie. Evil laughter follows. The flames rise up around Blitzo and Millie, but they remain unharmed. Leaving the married couple very confused.

"Yeah, that's not exactly how it works, lady. Sorry, your fire doesn't really hurt us, but, I mean, I could fake it if that'll get your dick hard." Millie and Blitzo smirk. Martha stares confused.

"Oh. sh*t." She rolled her eyes as she picked up her gun. "Well... I'll just shoot you in your smart-ass mouth!"

"That would be more effective." he said with a derpy smile that would definitely get him hit if they weren't tied up.

"Blitz!"

Martha laughs evilly again as she aims her rifle at the imps. Both imps close their eyes and flinch. Martha then yelps as a gunshot is heard. Martha's eye flies from her socket and she collapses to the ground. Moxxie is shown holding his gun.

"Moxxie!" Millie cheered as he ran over to untie them.

"You're not gettin' your goddamn paycheck for this one, Mox!" Blitzo falls down. Moxxie and Millie smile at each other and embrace.

Ralphie backtracks and trips over his wife's corpse. Quickly picks himself up to run away but is stopped by a very pissed Izuku who cracks his knuckles. Ralphie nervously tries to back away but before he could take another step Izuku punches him in the face. Sending him back a few feet with some of his teeth hitting the ground. Unfortunately, he was still conscious and ran away afterwards.

"Oh, yeah, thanks! I'm fine!" Blitz yelled sarcastically as he held his injured arm. Moxxie ran to him and helped him get to his feet.

"I'm sorry, sir. I compromised our objective and put us in harm's way. It won't happen again. I promise."

"Apology accepted." He brought him into a hug and spoke in a low threatening tone. "But, if you ever pull a stunt like this again, I will f*ck you and your wife."

"That's my job~" Izuku whispered, appearing next to them suddenly, flashing a small glare at Blitz for a split second.

"Alrighty! Job well done! Now let's get off."

"I'll be doing plenty of that later." Izuu says with a chuckle as Blitz pulls a gray and black horse toy from his chest. He puts it back and retrieves his cell phone.

"Ehhhh, yeah. Give me a moment. I need to get something I left at the house."

"Okay, fine. But, hurry up." Blitz rolled his eyes as he yelled into his phone. "Loonaaaa! We're ready to come home, dear!"

"I better go with him." izuku says as he quickly follows behind Moxxie.

They ran through the woods with a determined look on his face. They even ran past Blitz's phone that Stolas had continued to rave over. Not really noticing that no one was one the other end.

"... (bleeped) use while you and I and (bleeped) and jelly sandwiches all night...!" Izuku quickly hung up the phone and placed it in his pocket before the rant could go on any longer.

After they reached the house, they found Ralphie releasing his kids and bringing them into his arms protectively. Moxxie aimed his rifle at them with Izuku by his side cracking his knuckles. The father glaring at them with hatred and malice.

"Don't move!"

"What are you gonna do little guy? Kill us?"

"I should! You people are monsters! But... you should have a chance at a life and a purpose. Look at your children. They have their whole future ahead of them! You are going to face your crimes justly!"

Ralphie and the kids look at one another in confusion as they watch Moxxie pick up the supposed phone. With Izuku eyeing them the whole time.

"I will call your earthly authorities, and they will make sure you are dealt with fairly. I'm handling this... my way." Moxxie presses a button and the television turns on. Moxxie looks surprised and glances behind him. "Oh, sh*t."

"Uh... do you, uh... Do you have a phone to summon 911?" Moxxie glances at the TV remote, the buttons looking like eyes and a face.

"Yeah, it's in the kitchen." He points a thumb towards the other room.

"I'll get it." Izuku says as he walks out the room.

"Then... what is this for?" Moxxie question in confusion.

"It's a universal remote. Got it for the kids." Ralphie hugs them as Moxxie smiles, eyes shining.

"Awwwww." He cooed, touched by the parental affection.

"Okay, good news." Izuku made his way back into the room. "Cops are coming and they might be willing to hear out a plea deal. Then again we're in Texas."

"What's the bad news?"

"They might not listen." Izuku sighed heavily as he looked at the faimly. "Best case scenario, Big man here is either getting the death penalty or life in prison if he's lucky and the kids will likely be given years of psychiatric treatment in a mental hospital before getting the chance at real lives. So long as you say you and your wife forced them to participate in all of.....well this ...." He said, gesturing to pretty much the entire house.

"More or less true."

"So yeah. Just hang out on the lawn with your hands up and you should be fine. Just say you had a change of heart or some sh*t."

"Whats the worst case?"

"You're all gonna die and I'll be seeing you in Hell later on." Izuku thought for a minute. "And if that's the case, find your wife and head to the Cannibal Colony. Tell them Green sent you and you should be okay."

The two were set to leave but before he exited he looked back at the small family. His eyes drifted all over the room and all the memories they had made. This man took his son fishing. Martha had helped her daughter make her own costumes for a school play. They may have been monsters, but they were still a family that shared a great and important bond.

"No matter what happens, you are getting another chance." He looks at them with an almost pleading look. "Don't waste it. For your sake."

With that he ran out of the building at the sight of flashing lights in the distance. Soon they had rejoined Blitz and Millie back on the hill. The latter of the two looked at them with a more worried expression.

"They're they are!" Blitz called out with a big grin. "You two have a good time rearranging guts?"

"Excuse me?" Moxxie raised an eyebrow while Izuku simply stared at their boss unimpressed.

"Look, I don't care where you two cum in the living world. Just come to your job on time, alright?" Blitz pokes him several times for emphasis. "See you all at the office!" he laughs as he jumps through the portal.

"You doing okay, sweetie?" Millie asked, cupping his cheek affectionately.

"Better now, honey. I think I just needed a minute to process." He smiled as he held her hand close.

"You have a goooood heart, honey." She touches his chest before playfully pinching his nose. "Just a fuzzy head!" Millie kisses Moxxie to which he smiles lovingly at her as she walks through the portal.

"She's right, you know that Mox?" Izuku says as he is about to go through. "It's just one of the reasons I like you so much."

"I know." He smiles as he looks up at him and grabs his hand. "And Izuku, I never did give you proper thank you." He pulls him down low enough for him to reach and places a kiss to his cheek. Surprising him before he smiles at him.

As he was about to say something the sounds of sirens caught their attention. They turned around and saw two police cars and a helicopter outside the house. One officer spoke loudly over a loudspeaker.

"We got em', boys!"

A helicopter fires a missile through the roof and the house explodes in a massive inferno. They were left stunned by this as they looked at one another. Something hits Moxxie in the head before they could say anything. Looking down to see what is left of the girl's teddy bear head.

"I expected this yet somehow I am still surprised." Izuku mutters to himself with a small feeling of guilt. The two were so caught up that they failed to notice Blitz grabbing them by their collars and dragging them through the portal.

The final scene cuts to Mayberry and the imps celebrating their victory. A white banner reads "killed the bitch" in red letters. Loona and Mrs. Mayberry are holding pieces of cake on their plates. "We did it! :)" is written on the cake in light blue icing. Blitzo has his arm in a sling. Everyone is wearing party hats. Everyone laughs and cheers except Moxxie, who sits with a distressed look on his face.

"Ahhh, did you see my little Mox-Mox?!" Millie yelled excitedly as she hugged her husband.

"Yaaay!" Mayberry and Blitz cheered while Izuku tried to clear his head from the shock.

"Well, here's to another mission accomplished! And Moxxie finally learned not to f*ck up."

"And killin' people isn't that big of a deal if they try to kill you back!"

"That's messed up. But, I paid for it" Everyone except Moxxie and Izuku laughs.

"Yeah, f*ck that family!" Blitz yelled happily with a fist pump.

"Hey, Mrs. Mayberry?" Izuku spoke up, getting her attention. "You were a school teacher, right?"

"Yeah, why?" She questioned as she took another bite of her cake. "You got a fetish or something?"

"You wanna work for me? I need someone I can more or less trust to teach my kids." She seemed genuinely shocked by the question.

"What's the catch?"

"Just that you'll have to live in my fiance's hotel and participate in her program." Izuku explained while thinking of ways to sweeten the deal. "You get room and board with topnotch protection from a couple of the most powerful beings in Hell. While also getting to do something that you loved doing in the past."

"I guess you have a point." She thought it over for a few seconds before shrugging. "You know what, sure. I hate my current living situation anyway."

"Deal?" Izuku offers her a handshake, his hand having a faint blue glow that goes unnoticed.

"Deal." She shakes his hand, feeling a strange sense of warmth coursing through her body for a moment. They separate afterward and Mayberry notices something strange. A mark that has appeared on the back of her hand resembles a bird.

"That's so people know not to mess with you. Proof that you're under my protection." She continued to stare at it for a few seconds longer before letting out a small laugh.

"Thank you."

"Don't mention it."

An extra scene that I couldn't find a place to put so you can just imagine when it happened in this episode. Its more or less a parody of Blitz and Stolas' call from this episode:

Izuku was currently in the trees, hiding from the humans who had spotted them thanks to Moxxie's actions. Izuku hid in the cover of darkness, eyeing the surrounding area closely. Unsure of where he should go now. His thoughts were cut short however as his phone began ringing at him.

'I really need to put this on vibrate when I'm on missions.' He thought to himself as he answered it. "Hey there! Sorry but this is a really bad time Stella."

"Awe~ When isn't it a bad time darling?~"

Back in hell, in the Goetia palace located just outside of Imp City where one of Izuku's lovers, Stella, resided. Her voice was teasing and elegant as she spoke to him. In her private room, she relaxed in a bath with many scented candles lit around her. She held her cellphone to her ear as she giggled to herself.

"I know this is sudden but I was hoping that I could speak to you more about our arrangement." She playfully splashed some water around her as she massaged herself. "After all, its just be soooooo long since we've seen one another~"

"Stella we met up a few days ago."

"Really? Is felt more like years~"

Izuku listened to her laughter with a sigh. Which quickly turned into a gasp as a gunshot zoomed past him and destroyed a nearby branch. Cursing under his breath he moved swiftly through trees as Stella continued to talk.

"Anyway, you see Stolas is preparing a little deal with that imp of his and I got to thinking about what we could do together~"

"Well I guess that makes sense." He whispered as he heard another gunshot not too far away. "But seriously can we please talk about this later? Kinda in the middle of a situation here!"

"Then I'll keep this brief." She said as Izuku noticed something about his phone. Instead of being a simple audio call, Stella had switched it to video. She smirked as she propped herself up on the edge of her tub, showing off her moistened body that would normally send him into a mood.

"Once a month during the full moon, Stolas will bring that imp for his activities, so as such during that same day, we can stay at my beachside villa in Envy to have our fun. Along with proper dates and passionate fornication biweekly at the very least."

As she spoke, she planned her camera over her form as her free hand traced her curves. Her fingers stopped between her legs before she brought them up to her mouth and licked them slightly. Smirking as she began playing with her soft fluffy feathery breasts for him.

"Sounds fair, Daddy~?"

"Oh, look at you being so naughty~" He smirked as he watched her shiver through the video. "I bet you can't wait for me to strap you down again."

"Oh yes~ Daddy!~ I want you to tie me down as you (Bleep) my (Bleep) with your (Bleep) all night long with Mistress whipping my (Bleep) as my (Bleep) is stuffed with your (Bleep) for days on end~"

"Well you'll just have to wait for Daddy like a good girl~" He teased her playfully with a lustful smirk. "I'll see you soon my little Star~ You better behave~"

"I will Daddy~ I promise~" The call ended, leaving Izuku to ponder by himself for a bit.

"Well at least she didn't want to talk about that arrangement. But its likely gonna come up later." He sighed as he rubbed his temple. "Problem for future me. Time to save the day right now."

END

Chapter 6: The New Guest

Chapter Text

It was a new day here in Pentagram city, and it was still as sh*ty as ever. The streets were on fire, sinners were fighting and f*cking all over, and the hellborns were all to happy to join them. Although, there were two areas in the Pride Ring that were actually a bit more orderly. The first being the Cannibal Colony, home to the one and only Rosie, who made sure all her cannibals and cannibettes were all well behaved. In a strange sense, but that's a story for another time.

The other was an area that wasn't that far away from the Cannibal Colony, just a quick drive in fact. The streets were clean, the sinners there were in a surprisingly calm state and hellborns from all walks of life enjoying their day. Many of them were simply out for a stroll or on their ways to or from work. It was such a mundane slice of life that one could almost forget that they were demons in Hell. Almost.

If one were to walk through the streets they would notice that each of the citizens had one thing in common. Each of them had a symbol, whether it be stitched into their clothing or exposed on their skin like a tattoo. A mark that resembled a burning flame with a bird head that was at its center. The symbol of the overlord who owned this section of the pentagram. The symbol of theFlare District.

Meanwhile, at the Hazbin Hotel, which stood on the very top of a hill that was at the highest point of the district, was now preparing to open its doors for their very first occupant. Which was going about as well as many would expect with all the colorful characters who resided there.

"Niffy! Stop putting holes in the walls!" Vaggie yelled from atop a ladder where she was fastening the end of a banner to the wall.

"Must get the bugs! You can't hide from me!" The maid let out a gremlin noise as she continued to jam her knife into the walls. Eventually leading to her making one large enough for her to put her face in, which she did. "Here's Niffy!" She smiled viciously as the bugs huddled together in fear.

"Okay! That's enough!" Izuku chimed in as he grabbed her by her arms, causing her to dangle like a cat. "Niffy, sweetie, you can't keep doing this."

"But how can I get my job done if the pests keep hiding! I must clean!"

"I understand that but don't you see what you're doing?" He held her in his arm as he gestured over to the floor that was now covered in wood chips and pieces of insulation. "You're making a bigger mess and making your job harder."

"Oh? I didn't mean to." She muttered with a slight pout that was almost adorable.

"I know, Niffty." Izuku set her back down to the ground and gave her a pat on the head. "Now just clean it up and patch the holes. If you see any bugs, use this." He handed her a flyswatter, which she took gleefully as she went about her business.

"How are you able to do that?" Husk questioned from behind his bar as he sorted through all his supplies.

"Do what?"

"Talk her down from her usual sh*t. Alastor can't even do that!" Husk exclaimed as he witnessed such a deed. "Nor does he try to." He muttered as he continued his drinking. It was five o'clock somewhere after all.

"I just talk to her and she listens, I honestly don't see what the fuss is all about." Izuku shrugged with a small smile. "Niffy isn't that bad once you get to know her."

"Izuku, I love you, but seriously?" Vaggie deadpanned as she climbed down from the ladder. "She chewed through our door so she could sneak into our bed. I repeat. CHEWED!"

"I said she's not bad, not great. It's all a work in progress." Izuku sweatdropped as he watched the manic maid maniacally mash multiple mountains of roaches she had gathered with her trusty tool. One that she was currently snuggling against when her eyes caught his with a heavy blush on her face.

"She laid on your crotch and sniffed your junk all night long. She even tried to give you somespecial servicewhile you were still asleep." Vaggie continued with an air of annoyance as she spoke.

"I'll talk to her about that." He sighed as he noticed Angel carrying a few boxes. "Oh, did my deliveries get here already?"

"Yup! They must've rushed it knowing it was you." Angel said as he set them off to the side. "Seriously though, why are you guys getting in a tizzy over this?"

"How can we not?!" Charlie exclaimed, appearing out of nowhere and shocking the group. She was carrying boxes filled with all sorts of decorations and party supplies. She was wearing a party hat with several ribbons and streamers tangled up in her hair. "This is going to be our very first actual resident! We have to make a great impression!"

She rushed off in a dash as she threw many of the streamers into the rafters above. Some even narrowly missed Alastor who was watching everything going on. Izuku couldn't help but let out an amused laugh as he watched Charlie dance around the lobby.

"What the hell am I then?" Angel asked with a slightly narrowed gaze. To which Izuku let out a nervous chuckle.

"Angel, you are an appreciated part of this group and have been an.....adequate help in getting this place off the ground. However you do tend to....." Izuku began before struggling to find the right words. Thankfully vaggie was there to step in.

"You don't take anything seriously. You're constantly coming back drunk, high and reek of sex. You spend so much of your time partying or at work that you don't even attempt to try changing. Not to mention the constant sex jokes that border on harassment. Then you actually attempt harassing Izuku."

"Not my fault he has such a great ass."

"It is a great ass but that's besides the point." Vaggie groaned slightly with a facepalm. "I swear the only redeeming quality you have is that you help with the girls. Which I am still against it but they seem to like you."

"Wow. Thanks for the vote of confidence, toots." Angel walked away from them, leaving the two lovers alone now.

"Vaggie, that may have been a little harsh." Izuku winced slightly at the interaction.

"Harsh but it needed to be said."

"I agree with you but I still think you aren't giving him enough credit." Izuku sighed as he pulled out his phone. "I gotta go pick up Mayberry. Barbie should be back soon with the girls and the food will be here in about an hour or so."

"You know you didn't have to order take out. We could've cooked something easily enough."

"I know, but I figured we might as well splurge a bit on such a special occasion." He grabbed Vaggie by the waist and gave her a kiss. "I'll see you all when I get back. Call if I need to pick up anything while I'm out."

"Okay, hun. Love you." She smiled as she gave him a hug before he left.

"I love you more." He smiled lovingly as he began walking out.

"Love you lots, Izu!" Charlie yelled excitedly as she ran at him for a hug. Being caught in his arms and giving one another a kiss. "I knew it was a good idea for you to get that job."

"Yeah, it was." He kissed her again before setting her down. "I'll see you a bit, Apple Pie."

"Keep that sexy butt in control while you're out!" She yelled just as he left out the door.

~Small Timeskip~

Izuku groaned heavily in annoyance as he was driving through the streets of the city. The roads in the Flare District were typically clean, most of the time, and fighting was at a bare minimum. Unfortunately, the literal moment he left the district he was met with tons of fire, bombs, bullets, and severed limbs of all kinds. Making his trip to be slightly harder than it needed to be.

Finding clearer roads wasn't all that terrible, especially since many sinners immediately recognized his car and began cleaning out the street so he got through. Sometimes being an overlord really did have its perks. Especially when he's driving a customized 1970 Plymouth Barracuda outfitted with some of the best technology of the Pride Ring, courtesy of a very close friend.

Enough about that, Izuku was simply getting to the other side of Pentagram city where most of the buildings were a wreck. Mostly due to the massive amounts of violence that constantly occurred and the fact there were barely any construction companies that were willing to go over there due to the sinners who "controlled" the area. So needless to many of Hell's newest residents resided there until they could get their footing with their new afterlives.

He soon found his way to the address he was given. To which he was met by the site of a building that was missing an entire chunk of its upper floors and was spewing out water and sparks of electricity. Needless to say he was appalled by the sight and understood why Mayberry said she hated her living conditions. Luckily, Mayberry had already been waiting out of the sidewalk near the road with her few belongings that she had.

"Please tell me you weren't staying on any of the top floors." He grimaced as he got out of his car. Right on cue one of the rooms near the top of the building blew up with several body parts being launched away.

"I wasn't. The super here wasniceenough to give me a deal on one of the decent apartments." She let out a small awkward chuckle.

"Yeah, I don't even want to know."

"You definitely don't."

"Is this all you have?" He asked as he stared at the three small boxes that she had with her.

"Yeah, I haven't really been down here that long to actually have anything." She said as she picked up a box, Izuku grabbed the other two and went to the car.

"Well that won't do at all." Izuku commented as he quickly pulled out his phone and sent a quick text. "Just texted my fiance so you guys are gonna schedule a good date to do a bit of shopping."

"You don't need to trouble yourselves with that."

"But we want to. And you really can't say 'no' since she just agreed." He smirked a bit as they loaded into the car. "Also, you don't happen to have any food allergies do you?"

"None that I know about, why?"

"Oh, I just got a text from the restaurant asking if there were any last minute changes that I needed to make." He hummed as he looked over his order. "Anything specific you would like me to add?"

"No thank you. I don't want to be a bother."

"Nonsense! We over at the Hazbin Hotel spare no expense for our residents to feel the utmost comfort for their courage to partake of the path of Redemption." He smiled widely, sounding like a spokesperson you see on TV. "Besides I already kind of ordered a rather large portion of just about everything on the menu. And have been baking pies and cakes for dessert all morning."

"That sounds really expensive." She says with widened eyes as she just stares at him in shock. "Now I'm starting to feel a bit guilty. You all really didn't go through so much."

"It was mostly Charlie's idea to have a good impression." Izuku nervously chuckled while scratching the back of his head. "She really wanted to make you feel welcomed."

"I would've been happy with just a hello or maybe a coffee." Mayberry said, still slightly stunned at how much effort they were putting in for her. Her depression turned sour as her mind soon wandered into her once fond memories. "It's more than that prick ever did for me." She mumbled to herself.

Izuku overheard her comment and grimaced lightly as he remembered her story. He wanted to say something but ultimately decided against it. The two sat in silence for a few minutes, it was awkward to say the least. That is until Mayberry decided to resume the conversation.

"So, your kids." She began getting his attention. "Is there anything I should know before I start planning lessons?"

"Well, my daughters can be a bit on the energetic side but that's to be expected. Our oldest, Eri, is a bit shy but she should be able to open up to you fairly well if you can keep her spirits up. Her best subjects are science and math, but she struggles with English."

"Easy enough, I should be able to set up some fun projects that I think she'll thrive in." She gave a soft smile, happily thinking about how she can relive the joys her job brought her in her previous life. "And the others?"

"The middle child is our little pup, Akane. She has a tough time sitting still and really likes to be active. She can have a tough time learning sometimes but if you can keep your lessons entertaining I know she can thrive." Izuku explained, getting a nod from the teacher. "Then lastly there is Tilla, she's the youngest at only three years old. She is also quite smart for her age but you don't have to worry about her just yet. Her mothers will be the ones mostly taking care of her but we'll still be relying on you if need be."

"Well I hope to live up to your expectations."

"You'll be fine. You've been teaching for a while so I trust your judgment." He says, giving her a bright smile that causes a blush to form on her face.

'I didn't really notice before but...'Her blush deepens as she continues to stare at him.'He's really cute.'She quickly attempts to shake it off as if it were nothing.

"I know how much you love teaching. I could see the excitement in your eyes when I brought it up." He continued to smile as he drove, the roads soon clearing indicating where they were. "It's nice to know that there are still people down here who still carry their passion."

Mayberry had a soft smile on her face as he listened to his words. She really couldn't look him in the eye at the moment and simply looked down at her lap. Her blush refused to recede as she started nervously brushing her hair back out of her face. Her attention was soon drawn to the city outside with her eye's widening at the drastic differences from the other parts of the city.

"That's part of the reason I established my district here." He smiled as he drove, waving at the occasional pedestrians who waved his way.

"Y-your district?" He stuttered out as she gazed at the scenery passing by. Even getting a few waves from the folks they were passing by.

"Yup. I know you haven't been here too long to learn the basic hierarchy but down here there are some big bosses that control the Pride Ring." He explained as he continued to drive. "One of those overlords just so happens to be yours truly."

"That actually explains some things." She muttered to herself as she gained a worried expression.

"Something happened?"

"Just had a small run in with some weird.....talent agent at a bar not too long ago.." She became downtrodden as she gazed out the window. "They had gotten word of some of the stuff I did and said that they had connections with some big honcho. Val something I think he said."

'And knowing that pest he wouldn't take 'no' for an answer.'He grit his teeth in annoyance just imagining the headache that insect would cause him. "And I guess you declined his offer?"

"He seemed mad but I told him I'd consider it. Not long after a part of the complex I was in blew up in smoke."

"Well you dodged a bullet. More than a bullet, you basically dodged an entire firing squad." Izuku said with a faint growl that made her confused. "Anyway we're here now." He said before she could question anymore.

They exited the car with the Mayberry's boxes floating behind them as they made their way to the door. Of course she was nervous to say the least. Afterall, she was about to meet her new employers and things could get hairy fast if she didn't make a good impression. She was fidgeting in place as she watched him open the door. Before it was even a crack open as a flash of red flew into her view.

"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!" Charlie yelled happily as she wrapped the woman in a very tight hug. The taller blond even lifted her off the ground and twirling a bit. "I know that you are going to absolutely love it here!"

She soon put the teacher down who, despite being fairly dizzy, couldn't help but let out a small giggle at Charlie's excitement. Especially with her wide toothy grin and starry eyed expression that was undeniably adorable. Needless to say after that display her words had melted away.

"Come! Come! I have so much to show you!" Charlie had begun dragging Mayberry into the lobby and stopping at varying spots in the room. "Welcome to our Home of Healing! The Resort of Restoration! Your new temporary slice of Heaven before hopefully getting there!"

And now Mayberry was back to being dizzy again. Now with a bit of a sore arm thanks to the surprisingly strong woman. Not to mention the little debacle had garnered the attention of several of the other occupants who were now staring in their direction. Most of them with soft smiles while others were just plain uninterested.

"Um...Hello everyone." Mayberry greeted them with a small wave. "I'm Mara Mayberry and I hope we can get along." She nervously chuckled.

"So you're the one who is gonna be teaching my girls." Her gaze was drawn down to an imp woman who was looking over her up and down with a small glare. "You seem decent enough. But I have my eye on you."

"Aw~ Barbie you are so cute when you try to be intimidating~" Izuku cooed as he grabbed her into his arms. Making her blush a heavy shade of scarlet, shattering her facade almost instantly.

"Babe! C'mon!" She pouted with her arms crossed, her tail swaying ever so slightly in enjoyment. "I was practicing my 'protective mommy glare' for hours!"

"Don't pout, Kitten." He gave her a short kiss before hugging her tightly. "I just can't resist when you get so protective like that. It fills me with so much joy seeing how much you love our little cherubs~"

"Almost as much as you fill me up?~" She questioned with a sultry look in her eyes.

"Absolutely~" They kissed again but a cough from Vaggie quickly stopped them.

"Papa and Mama are flirting again." Eri said as she held onto Vaggie's hand with Akane right behind her and Tilla in her arms.

"Mommy and Daddy never learn do they?" Akane questioned with a head tilt.

"O-okay then!" Barbie quickly leaps out of his arms and tries to adjust herself. "Well that was a bust but either way welcome!"

"Teacher?" Tilla asked, gesturing over to Mayberry, who was starting to recover from the heavy blush that adorned her face from watching the loving display.

"Yes sweetie. She's gonna be teaching your sisters while she's here." Vaggie explained with a small smile.

"And she's also gonna be participating in our program." Charlie exclaimed as she excitedly bounced. Getting a few laughs from the girls.

"Teacher, pretty!" The toddler exclaimed with a big smile, making Mayberry smile softly.

"Thank you, Tilla." Mayberry smiled warmly. Feeling a sense of joy returning to her as she was met by Eri and Akane walking over to her. "Hello there little ones. It's nice to meet you." She knelt down to them with a smile.

"We made you a card." Eri said as she handed her said card.

The card itself was very simple as it read "Welcome Teacher" on it, but it still made her smile as she looked over the various decorations that were on it. From apples with smiling faces on to many stars and moons dotting the page. There were even some rainbows drawn on there, even though some of them had some mismatched colors on them but it was cute either way.

"And we made necklaces too!" Akane said as she held up a few beaded charm necklaces. "Can I put them on you?"

Mayberry smiled even wider at this gesture. She nodded as bowed her head to the small pup to put them on her. Though she did struggle a bit due to the horns, they made it work. After words, she let out a small laugh as she played with some of the charms.

"Thank you very much girls. I promise I will treasure these forever." She smiled happily with the children returning the gesture.

"This is so wholesome." Angel commented but his expression was nothing but sour. "I think I'm gonna hurl rainbows after this."

"Not a fun experience." Husk sad as he continued downing his umpteenth bottle of Cheap Booze.

"Way to ruin the moment, boys." Izuku deadpanned at the two who shrugged him off. "Well I guess we should get introductions out of the way. You've already met my fiance Charlie."

"Hello again! And this cutie patootie is our girlfriend Vaggie!" She smiled as she wrapped her into a hug.

"Nice to meet you." Vaggie greeted, a small blush on her cheeks due to Charlie's antics.

"You've already met me." Barbie waved as was now holding Eri and Akane in her arms. "We also have another girlfriend but she isn't here right now due to work."

"That must suck, huh?" Mayberry let out a tired sigh, remembering all the times her ex-husband had left her all by her lonesome due tobusiness trips.

"It does but she'll be back in a few days. I think you and Vee are gonna get along well though." Izuku said with a smile. "Plus she'll be able to help you with the girls."

"That'll be nice."

"Anyway." Izuku continued as he led her to the bar. "This fluffy boy is Husk, our wonderfully well experienced bartender and frankly the closest this place has to a therapist."

"Because every drunk wants to yap their gums at the bartender." Husk groaned while flipping the bird before returning to his job. "And if you want a therapist why don't you find one?"

"Because almost every therapist that's down here is here because they use their skills to manipulate people." Izuku groaned, remembering all the interviews he had to go through. "I mean there are plenty of Hellborn but I figured a sinner would help people open up."

"That and because patients could get unruly so a sinner would survive. Hellborns not so much." Charlie shuddered as she was also involved in many of those interviews.'I don't think I can remember another time I saw Izuku's flames so much.'

"And here we have our only other resident, Angel Dust?"

"Like the drug?"

"Exactly."

"How do you know that anyhow?" Angel asked with a small smirk as he sucked on one of his popsicles.

"I was a troubled child." She admits with a sorrowful expression.

"I hear that." Was the p*rnstar's response.

"And lastly we have our dutiful housekeeper, Niffty." Izuku introduced, getting the maid's attention.

She immediately rushed over in a flash, showing off her ruffled up uniform that was currently covered in what used to be bugs. She had a wide smile on her face that unsettled her before she jumped onto her. Going through every accessible nook and cranny of her body excitably. After about a minute she stopped and latched onto her chest.

"Hello. I clean." She said menacingly staring into her eyes.

"We're about 85% sure she's harmless." Charlie said with a slight sweatdrop. Izuku chuckled as he grabbed the short woman off the teacher.

"I finished cleaning!" Niffty giggled as she latched onto Izuku and nuzzled up close. "Did I do a good job? Am I a good girl?" She asked with a wide smile.

"Yes Niffty. You did a great job. I see you used the swatter I gave you." He said as he gave the maid a head pat, which caused her the sake and shiver upon contact. "But look at you! You're all dirty now."

"I'm a m-mess?" She stuttered out looking about ready to cry.

"No! No no no! Calm down, Niffty." He gently patted her head to sooth the unstable woman. "I'm just worried, I don't want you to get sick or hurt."

"R-really?"

"Of course. So how about you go take a nice warm bath, okay? You earned it for being such a good girl." He mentally chided himself for talking to her like that but he knew it was necessary.

"Okay! I'll go get super clean for you!" She smiled widely, making him a bit unnerved. She immediately grabbed his face and planted her lips to his, shocking him and most of the others watching ."Love you Daddy!" She yelled as she dashed away to her room.

"Is that a common occurrence around here?" Mayberry squeaked out with a blush on her face.

"Yeah, Izuku's the only one that keeps her relatively stable." Vaggie said with a bit of annoyance.

"I didn't ask for it!" Izuku cried in exasperation with the others just staring at him. "Anyway, where's Alastor?"

"Who knows? That venison freak does as he pleases with no warning at all." Husk grumbled while cleaning a glass.

"Well I guess we'll just have to introduce him later." Izuku said not really caring before returning his attention to their new guest. "And if you happen to come across him make sure the mark I gave you is visible."

"What? Why?" She raised an eyebrow.

"So he won't make a deal with you!" Husk growled angrily slamming a glass to the counter. Causing a bit of a stir to occur upon the onlookers. "I'll tell you from experience, no matter what he offers, don't give him an inch. Anything you could gain is not worth a damn being entangled with all his bullsh*t!"

Angel looked at the winged feline with a mask of indifference, hiding how he actually felt about it. Izuku stared at him with a look of worry that made it very apparent for his one time friend. Charlie was scared slightly and was now hanging onto Vaggie from the shock, who leveled a glare at the cat for his outburst. The girls were also frightened but Eri quickly left the room and went into the kitchen.

Before any of them could question it, she came out with a cupcake in hand that was haphazardly decorated to look like a cat. A cat bared a striking resemblance to Husk himself. She went behind the counter and held it up to him with a small smile on her face.

"Sorry kid." He said softly as he took the confection from the child. He didn't really think much of it but then she hugged him. Much to his surprise. "Um.....There there?" He patted her head nervously.

"You have soft paws." Eri said with a small giggle that caused everyone in the room to smile. Even Husk cracked a grin at it.

"Well enough depressing crap!" Barbie voiced out to cut the moment short.

"Yeah! Let's eat!" Charlie shouted as she gestured to the table filled with food.

"You weren't kidding when you said you ordered a lot." Mayberry stared in disbelief at the long buffet tables in the lobby. "Also when did those get here?"

"Magic."

"Dibs on the wellington!" Akane barked excitedly as she went towards the table.

"Pace yourself sweetie!" Vaggie yelled in worry as she followed after her.

"Heck yeah! Let's party!" Angel shouted as he held an entire tray of lasagna.

"Angel! Save some for everyone!"

"Never!"

"What did I get myself into?" Mayberry sighed but she couldn't help but smile at the excitement unfolding.

Chapter 7: ~Loo Loo Land~

Chapter Text

The episode opens to a shot of the exterior of a large palace at night, before cutting to the master bedroom where the married couple of Stolas and Stella of the Ars Goetia are asleep.

"Mummy! Daddyyyy!" The frightened child's voice roused Stolas from his sleep. He blinks a few times before he turns to Stella who has most of the blanket.

"Mmph. Via's calling us, Stella." He groggily said to his wife who groaned at him

"You get up." She said in an annoyed tone as she took more of the blanket.

Stolas let out a heavy sigh before he removed himself from the bed. Frankly he was glad to get away from her for a short while but he needed to focus. Putting on his robe he quickly made his way to his daughter's room. Entering softly seeing his child hiding under the covers of her bed

"Via? What troubles you, my owlet?"

"Daddy! Daddy!" The young Octavia climbs down from her bed and runs into her father's arms. Stolas hoists her up to comfort her. "I had a dream! A really bad dream!"

"A nightmare." He corrected with a small yawn as he carried her back to her bed.

"I was looking all over the palace, and... I couldn't find you anywhere! You weren't there!" She sobbed as she hugged her father tighter.

"There there, Via, it's okay. You're okay." He gently rubbed her back as his grimoire began floating beside him. "When you're scared, and you don't know where I am, you must remember no matter what happens to me, I will never be far away from my special little starfire."

His lullaby finished, Stolas leaves as his young daughter settles to sleep, content. Cut to several years later, where a teenage Octavia is jolted awake by smashing objects and her parents screaming at each other, far less content. Sitting up with a scowl as she started yet another morning with her dysfunctional family.

"You inconsiderate bastard!" She heard her mother scream, followed by the sound of something smashing. "Do you have any idea how much work I put into that!"

"I'm sorry! It wasn't my idea!" Stolas could be heard frantically trying to explain himself. "I was blindfolded and dragged in there! I didn't know which room I was in! I promise net time to just go to a motel!"

"A motel?! Like a f*cking PLEBEIAN?!" Stella yelled out once again, followed by even more sounds of destruction. "You can't even have the decency to own up to your own sh*t!"

Octavia, no longer wanting to hear her parents argue, grabs her phone and puts in earbuds, playing "My World is Burning Down Around Me" to tune out the screaming. It didn't help all that much but she continues to stride down the halls of the Goetia estate, stepping over the smashed remains of a plant thrown in her path. In the kitchen, Stella continues screaming at Stolas.

"You miserable Leviathan sized asshole!" Stella yells as she grabs an imp servant and violently tosses him in Stolas' direction.

"I promise I'll have everything replaced!" Stolas cries as he narrowly dodges the servant.

"You better!" She yells out, almost on the verge of tears, as she quickly leaves the room. "I'm not spending another moment looking at your pathetic, IMP-SUCKING FACE!!"

Stella storms out of the room, shouting angrily the entire time, and smashing more potted plants. Stolas sighs in exhausted exasperation before he notices his daughter has entered the kitchen. He couldn't help but let out a massive sigh as he watched her leave. Along with just how much trouble she is causing for their servants.

'Does she even realize how hypocritical she sounds.'He rolled his eyes as she soon focused his attention on his daughter. "Good mooorning, Octavia! Did you sleep well, my owlet?"

"Was that a serious question?" She asked sarcastically before sipping on her cup of liquid sanity. Satan knows she's gonna need it.

"Mm-hmm... What's that you're listening to?" Stolas inquires as he opens the refrigerator to retrieve a massive chunk of zebra meat.

"This song is called "My World is Burning Down Around Me". (beat) It's by f*ck You Dad." She says as Stolas looks down, thinking the name of the band his daughter mentioned is a hurtful remark. "It's a band."

"Ohhhh! How charming..." He said with a bemused tone. Grabbing the zebra meat and feeds it to a massive potted plant situated in a small alcove off the kitchen as he pets it. Sated, it falls dormant, closing its three eyes.

"So, you two done screaming for the day?"

"Umm..." Stella lets out another scream of anger and another potted plant is heard shattering in the distance. "You know what I haven't done in a long, loooong time? I haven't taken you to your favorite place in all of Hel! Why don't we go to Loo Loo Land?"

"I'm not five anymore." She grumbled, knowing that he wasn't listening at all.

"You always were so happy when I took you to Loo Loo Land! What do you say we go there again, have a day, just the two of us?" He says hopefully. Gesturing to a large picture beside them. One of a young Octavia with a wide smile with an equally happy Stolas and Stella who was rolling her eyes but smiled nonetheless.

"I'd... rather kill myself." She said flatly, wanting nothing more than to be emo anywhere other than there.

"There we go! Anything but staying in this house. Now, I'll arrange our security." Stolas picks up a phone carried on a platter by his now bruised and battered servant.

"Security for a theme park?" She raised an eyebrow, wondering why it was she could never recall seeing any security on the trips during her childhood.

"We are rich, and we're hot. People want our money and our bodies!"

"Our money, maybe." Octavia grumbles as she grabs a box of cereal on the table and begins shoveling handfuls into her mouth.

"There will be someone who'll desire you soon enough, princess." He whispers to himself as he typed the number in the phone. "Now... I'm calling the only man who can f*** me!"

"What...?" She said with disgust as she dropped the cereal in her hand.

"Who can protect me! Us!" He immediately began to backpedal away from that topic. "Being part of the Goetia family is rather valuable, you know." He says, causing Octavia to groan as she pulls her beanie over her face.

Cut to I.M.P. where Blitz is busy doing very important work in his office, involving crude representations of Millie and Moxxie made out of office supplies that he puppets around and speaks with. Between them is a framed photo of Blitz with a robe pulled down off his shoulders seductively and a flower between his teeth. The text reads "#1 Bitch" with "BOSS" written in red over it.

"Oh, Blitz! You're such a good boss!" He impersonated Millie before moving onto Moxxie. "Yeah, I really want you, sir." "Me, too!" He finally started talking normally. "Lets threeway!~"

Blitz lowers his "employees" below his desk to crotch level, looking momentarily pleasured before being interrupted by the ringing of his Hellphone.

"WHAT?!"

"Why, hello, my big-dicked Blitzy~" Stolas said lustfully, which caused both Blitz and Octavia to spit out their coffee in sheer surprise. Blitz slams his "BOSS BITCH" mug onto his desk.

"What–"

"the–"

"f*ck–"

"Dad?!"

"Language, everyone!" He says calmly before returning to the phone. "I have a special request~"

"Aw... Look, I just had a chemical peel. So, you'll have to find someone else's face to plant that feathered ass."

"It's for my daughter." He really should've worded that better.

"Ah. Well, make sure she washes it and I'll send the kid over." Blitz said as he placed the tiny crown on top of his head.

"No! No, no-no-no." He stutters out, taken aback by the statement. "I'm taking my daughter to Loo Loo Land, and I was hoping you brave little Imps and Midoriya would accompany us!"

"We're assassins, not bodyguards, 'kay? Don't invite us to sh*t unless someone's gonna die." Blitz says as he continues to drink his coffee. "Well, the kid probably would."

"I'll pay you~" Stolas said playfully, hoping to grab his attention

"Pay me what?" He asked back, knowing full well that he need to ask it when it comes to Stolas,

"Moneyyyy~"

"Done!" Blitzo hangs up and accidentally slams his phone down on the desk hard enough to smash it to pieces. After a brief annoyed glance at it, he pulls out a megaphone. "M n' M! Kid, get in here! We're goin' to Loo Loo Land!"

"Loo Loo Land?" Moxxie opens the door to respond in a confused manner.

"Loo Loo Land?!" Millie excitedly smashes her head straight through the office door's glass with stars in her eyes.

"Loo Loo Land!"

"SHUT THE f*ck UP!!" Loona yelled out from the other room.

"What's going on?" Izuku could be heard questioningly.

"Nothing! Now get back under there!" Loona instructed, angry that her time was being cut short.

The three imps heard this however which left them with varying reactions. Moxxie blushed slightly, averting his gaze. Blitz scowled and chugged his coffee want to forget that it was happening. And Millie was smirking widely while she stared off into the direction of Loona's desk.

Cut to Loo Loo Land. A van with an I.M.P decal spray painted on the side pulls into the rather empty parking lot. Moxxie exits the van and opens the side door. A very cramped Stolas extracts himself excitedly. His daughter exits the van far less excitedly. Stolas dons an apple-themed hat and gestures toward the park gate. Octavia groans and pulls her hat low over her face.

Izuku's car is seen following shortly behind them before exiting the car and making sure it's locked. He knows how things work in the Greed Ring. Octavia watches him closely with a small blush adorning her face.

"What took you so long, kid?" Blitz asked, slightly annoyed.

"It's more of 'who', Bitz." He stared him dead in the eyes. "Your daughter, Blitz, Your daughter."

"Ah, Midoriya!" Stolas came over, greeting him with a handshake. Which he happily reciprocated. "Its always so nice to see you. How have you been?"

"Its been hectic at times but nothing I can't handle. And I finally got a lovely teacher to tutor my little girls."

"Speaking of, come meet my little Owlet." Stolas gestured over to Octavia who was still staring at Izuku. "This here is my adorable little girl, Octavia."

"D-Dad?!" She squealed in embarrassment, not want him to ruin this.

"Well I can definitely see that, Stolas." He smiled as he reached out for a handshake. "Its lovely to meet you, Octavia."

"L-likewise." She accepted his hand, but what she didn't expect was for Izuku to take her hand and place a kiss on it. The act caused her blushes to grow wider as steam seemed to be coming from her ears.

"And don't you worry about a thing, I'll make sure you're safe and sound throughout the entire trip, Sweetie." He smiled at her, a smile that radiated kindness and warmth.

"T-Thank you very much." She stuttered out but she smiled nonetheless at the gesture.

Stolas, who was watching this, couldn't help but smile, thinking that their first meeting was going well. That is until Blitz being who he is ruined the entire thing.

"Come on you horny f*cks lets get this over with!" He said as he sauntered into the park.

"Well that killed the moment." Millie grumbled, hating that her boss ruined the cute display she was seeing.

"Now, remember: this is work and work only. Me and my crew are not here to satisfy your perverted bird needs, alright?" Blitz says as Stolas simply looks over the park.

" Hey... Dad... Do we have to--?" Octavia says disgustedly before being cut off by Blitz.

"Okay, yeah. Hold on right there, sweetie." He returns his attention to Stolas. "If you try f*ckin' my little ass in that park, I swear to–"

"You are so cute when you are serious!" He says as he boops Bitz's little snoot.

"I'm literally gonna be sick." Octavia groans in disgust at watching her father being this thirsty. Not all know the crazy things her mother says to her lover but she'll find out soon enough.

"Oh, crumbs! I knew today would be a lot! What do you need?" Moxxie fishes around in a fanny pack and throws out several pill bottles as he lists off his inventory. "Anti-acids? Ibuprofen?" Moxxie shows Octavia several hypodermic needles of a glowing, acid green substance. "Morphine?"

"That was figurative, old man." Octavia scowls as she moves to follow behind her father.

"Oh, be nice. Mox just likes to be prepared." Izuku chuckles lightly. "But I think the morphine was a bit overkill."

Moxxie chuckles sheepishly as he discards the needles into a nearby baby carriage, where a baby imp happily reaches out to play with its dangerous new "toys." Seeing this Izuku springs into action before the child gets hurt.

"And that's a big nope." Izuku quickly took the needles out of the infant's reach and threw them into an actual trash can. "I hope he doesn't get that careless with his own kids......Oh, who am I kidding Mox would wrap them up in bubble wrap everytime they left the house."

The little one giggled at him, prompting the greenette to smile as he tickled the baby's cheek. Little did he know that Octavia was watching his display with a blush on her face.

"Wooooow! I haven't been to this place since I was a tot!" Millie says excitedly as she watches a large letter fall off the sign of a nearby ride, crushing the teenaged imp underneath. "It hasn't changed a bit. Ohhh! LOOK! It's Big Wobbly!"

Millie gestures toward a hideously malformed animatronic dinosaur, which opens its mouth and lets out a terrifying, demonic shriek.

"That is... deeply upsetting." Moxxie says bewildered by his wife's amusem*nt of such a thing.

"Oh, come on! It's fun! You've never been here?"

"No. Theme parks always disturbed me, especially the mascots." Right as he says that the park's mascot appears out of nowhere behind Moxxie.

"Well, hey there!" The person dressed as a giant hideous apple calls out.

"AAAAAH!!" Moxxie screams in terror as he jumps back and lands in Izuku's arms Scooby Doo style.

"I'm Loo Loo! Welcome to Loo Loo Land! If y'all get hurt here, just try and sue us!"

"Challenge accepted." Izuku mutters to himself as he has Hell's very best lawyers on speed dial. That and he owns most of them. Don't question it.

"Look! Via! It's Loo Loo!" Stolas gasps excitedly while trying to get Octavia interested as well.

"I have a question." Octavia smirks as she gets the mascot's attention.

"Well, ask away, little girlie! A-hyuk a-hyuk a-hyuk!"

"Is it true this park is just a really shameless spin-off of the far more popular Lu Lu World?" She smirks confidently while Loo Loo tries not to let it show.

"....No?"

"As someone who has gone there on multiple occasions, I can safely say that this place is the most bootlegged bootleg to ever bootleg in the history of bootlegs." Izuku says with a small chuckle, getting a laugh out of the young Goetia as well.

"This place reeks of insecure corporate shame." Octavia says as she stares dead into the mascot's eyes.

"Why don't we go check out the rides?" Stolas chuckles nervously as he leads Octavia away.

"That chick's creepy, huh?" The apple man said now starting to rethink his career choices.

"Eh, wait till her dad tries to diddle your holes." Blitz says with a deadpan as he follows the bodies he's supposed to be guarding.

"What's that mean?"

"Don't talk to me!" Moxxie growls while still being held in Izuku's arms. " I know you're a pervert under there!" He points an accusatory finger while glaring at him.

Izuku glares at him as well before walking away while still holding Moxxie. Millie shoots a quick glare at Loo Loo before following after them. Jumping up onto Izuku's shoulder and leaving behind the dejected worker.

"Yeah..." He silently admits, soon being met by a fireball that sent him flying into a pile of trash. Getting many amused laughs from onlookers.

Back with the trio, Millie continues to excitedly look around from Izuku's shoulder while Moxxie has finally realized the position he was in. Gaining a slight blush that got a smile out of Izuku while they caught up with each other.

"You really like this place, huh?" Moxxie asked his wife who was still happily smiling at the surroundings.

"I love this place! My parents would bring me and my siblings here when they could swing it. Money-wise." She says clearly seeing the park through the lenses of childhood nostalgia.

"Remind me to treat you all to a nice afternoon at Lu Lu World when we all get a chance." Izuku says with a smile, getting an excited laugh out of Millie.

"You're such a good boyfriend, Hun." She hugs head, purposely getting his face right into her tit*.

"Anything for you guys." He smiles with a blush on his face, not really attempting to move his face away from its place.

Moxxie looks over to see a worker wheeling a wheelbarrow piled to the brim with money into a nearby gift shop. The two approach the window, where novelty cups and stuffed apples are for sale. The cups appear to cost at least 29 Souls per item.

"Yeaaaah. The prices do seem rather criminal here. I mean, that much for a novelty cup that you use one time?"

"'Cause, it's Loo Loo Land!" Millie says excitedly while Izuku shakes his head in disapproval.

"Yeesh. You could twelve cups for that price in Lu Lu World and still have enough for at least three buckets of popcorn." He groans disapprovingly at the shop, getting the shopkeeper to flip him off. "Yeah I am definitely treating you and your family to Lu Lu World."

Blitzo walks up, having loaded up on merch, including a novelty cup, as well as a hat with attached can holders and straws. Needless to say Izuku was very annoyed considering those were definitely bought off of the company's already low budget money.

"Okay that's enough flirting." Blitzo takes a swig from his novelty cup. "How 'bout the kid and I take the first watch while you two have a little fun?" He said with a wink.

"OOOOOH! That sounds so great!" Millie gives Izuku a quick kiss to the cheek before jumping off of his shoulder and grabs Moxxie from his arms. "We gotta do my favorite ride!"

"Oh, yeah? Wh- which one?" Moxxie asked worriedly, both for their safety and their wallets.

Cut to a shot of a lone imp riding a roller coaster named "The Lawsuit" that suddenly plunges off a sheer 90-degree drop at incredible speed while also on fire and with its rider hanging on for dear life. The coaster violently plunges into a tunnel in the ground.

"Oh, crumbs!" He lets out a terrified squeal as he fears for his life.

Cut to Moxxie vomiting into a trash can after having left the ride. A vomit-covered family walks by in the background, glaring disapprovingly at Moxxie. A massive dragon-like creature from the nearby petting zoo looms overhead, also glaring at Moxxie.

In another part of the park, Stolas and Octavia walk along the path, as Blitzo takes up positions all around them with his rifle, on the lookout for any danger. A group of imps creep up behind the booths, ropes, knives, and pitchforks at the ready. They quickly scatter as Blitzo looks in their direction.

"You really need to chill out, Blitz." Izuku says before getting flipped the bird from his boss.

"Is he always like this?" Octavia asks, getting a small groan in response from him. "That bad?"

"You have no idea."

"You know, it's quite thrilling to see you on the job, Blitzy." Stolas playfully strokes the tip of Blitz's horn getting a side-eye from the imp.

"Save it, bitch. I'm working."

"You both need to get a room." Octavia states, annoyed at their antics.

"Preferably one FAR away from us." Izuku adds before something catches his eye. Something that shocks him before sighing.

"Hey, I am not a day-hooker!" Bitz declared loudly as a woman walking nearby with her baby glares at Blitzo before continuing on in a huff. "What? I just said I'm not one, prude!" He says as he flips her off.

"Oh! Look, Via!" Stolas points excitedly at the circus tent. A demon mother is struggling to pull her crying son into the tent. "You used to cry such tears of joy at this show!"

"Oh, no..." And with that her childhood PTSD has now kicked in.

Cut to a flashback to Octavia as a young girl, as she is pushed against the stage by an excited crowd of imp children, as sparks and cackles maniacally leering over Octavia, who soon breaks into tears. A younger Blitzo is seen in the background tending to a food cart, dressed and painted as a clown, scowling.

"I hate that f*cking clown." Blitz and Octavia say in unison, getting an amused chuckle from Izuku.

Pan to Stolas, who has been captured and hoisted aloft by the crew of imps from earlier. Stolas' arms are bound and his head is covered by a cloth sack, and the imps are pointing various weapons at him. One has stolen Stolas' wallet.

"Oh, Blitzy~ I need my bodyguard, please!" He calls out, not at all concerned in the slightest.

One imp jumps, to try and skewer Stolas with a pitchfork. Blitzo quickly brings his rifle to bear, shooting the imp in the torso, splattering Stolas's head with blood. The other imps quickly scatter.

Octavia enters the big top and finds a seat. Blitzo carries Stolas in, head still covered in the blood-soaked sack, sets him down, and walks off to take position. Stolas makes no move to remove the sack, until Octavia annoyed rips it off her father's head. Izuku makes his way next to them and hands each of them some cotton candy he got from a stall beforehand.

"Hey-hey-hey-hey-heyyyy, Implings! It's me, the Robotc Fizzarolli!" The robotic entertainer stutters and sparks in front of the crowd. "Shipped from Big Ozzie's factory to bring you a wonderful show celebrating Loo Loo Land, spelled with Os, to avoid lawsuits! H-H-H-H-H-Hit it!"

Meanwhile, Moxxie and Millie walk along a row of game booths, when they are addressed by one of the vendors. Millie gleefully yanks Moxxie over towards the booth.

"Hello, hello! Step right up and win a thing!" He said gesturing to the "thing" in question is some sort of purple stuffed penguin creature with Imp horns, wearing pink overalls. The stuffed animal is labeled with a tag that says "THING?"

"Oh, look, Moxxie! A THING!" She gasps excitedly as she looks over the confused stuffed creature.

"Oh, you like that thing?" Moxxie smiled as Millie let out an excited squeal.

"YEEEEESSS! I don't really know what that thing is but I want that thing!" She smiled wildly as she bounced around. "Oh! We gotta get a couple for the kids too!"

"Alrighty then." He smiled slightly smug as he approached the stand. "Finally, something I can handle." Moxxie takes out some money and hands it to the carnie. "Okay! Four games, puh-lease!"

The carnie Imp rolls his eyes and uses his tail to hand Moxxie a pistol with a cork projectile in the muzzle. Moxxie does not even line up the shot, instead looking to his wife as he effortlessly hits the target right in the bullseye. Unbeknownst to Moxxie, the target barely moves. He makes a "ricochet" noise with his mouth and blows the black powder smoke clear of the gun, pleased with his marksmanship.

"Ohhhh! Strike one, little man!" The Carnie says smugly as he smirks down at him. "But hey! You got three more!"

"But, I hit it!"

"Hmmm, I don't know what to tell ya, buddy. The target, see? It didn't go down. So, yeah...! No go, bro."

Moxxie growls in anger, and grabs the pistol and fires another cork, hitting the target dead-center. The target does not budge. Moxxie slaps the pistol in annoyance.

"The Heaven's wrong with this thing?!" He smacked the toy pistol annoyed with the performance of the piece.

"Two to go little man." He continued to smugly look down at Moxxie. "Oh, man. A real shame, I tell ya." He cries mockingly, making Moxxie hisses in anger as he slaps another bill on the counter.

"Another!"

Cut back to the Robo Fizz show. Stolas is gleefully clapping to the music, while Octavia has thrown her head back in torment, banging her fist on the seat next to her. Izuku was simply staring at the replica of a famous imp with a bit of annoyance. Wondering how that thing even still functions with how horribly maintained it is.

" --body sing along with the Loo Loo band! Ev'ry boy, ev'ry girl, ev'ry woman, ev'ry man loves Loo Loo Laaaaaaand!"

The show ends with a small pyrotechnic display as Robo Fizz cackles maniacally. The bear animatronic faceplants onto the stage and falls to pieces. Stolas claps and cheers even harder.

"Ah hohohoho ho ho ho ho ho, how delightful!"

Behind Stolas, an imp armed with a kris dagger rises from beneath the seats ready to stab Stolas, but the top of his head is quickly blown apart by a shot from Blitzo, who has taken up a position in the gallery behind the back row of seats while Imps scream in absolute fear and run away.

"Oh, my! What aim you have, Blitzy." Stolas speaks flirtatiously not even noticing his daughter's anger bubbling up.

"Ugh! I can't do this anymore!" Octavia stands up angrily and begins running away. Shocking Stolas out of his trance.

"Wait- Uh-... Octavia!" He runs after her with Izuku following behind him concerned.

Blitz cycles his rifle, and prepares to give chase after his charges when the robot on stage gets his attention.

"Mua ha ha ha ha hoho-oh! Is that Blitzo my sensors spot up the-e-e-ere? I bet the kiddies are still running away from you, huh?" He lets out a sickly laugh that get his attention.

"The 'o' is silent now!"

"A-A-Awwwww, just like your audience always was when you to-told your lazy jokes here!" He laughs as Blitzo removes his visors and throws them on the ground as he continues his argument with Robo Fizz.

"Bitch, I make more money killing people than you do being a cheap-ass robo ripoff of an overrated sellout JESTER!"

"Oohoohoo! Someone's salty!" Robo Fizz glitches maniacally. "Real or not, though, people lo-o-ove me! Does anybody love you...BLITZO?"

"No." He says flatly before smirking and brandishing his rifle. "But, I'm really good with guns now. Dance, bitch!"

Blitzo slams a new magazine into his rifle, switches it to full-auto and opens up on Robo Fizz, who cartwheels out of the way of the incoming rounds. Robo Fizz rapidly spins like a wheel rolling up the stairs to where Blitzo is. He coils himself around Blitzo like a snake, before using his own momentum to launch Blitzo through the top of the tent.

"Ohhhh, f*ck MEEEEEEE...!"

"Torches, I say, I say! Get your inconvenient torches here!" Wally Wackford rolls a cart of lit torches outside the tent. Blitz lands on the cart, scattering the torches everywhere, which light the big top on fire.

"Owww! I say, OWWWW!"

The green fire very rapidly spreads to all corners of the park. Burning and melting animatronics flee the tent as Robo Fizz cackles and spins his head with demonic glee at the destruction. Elsewhere, the carnie Imp at the shooting gallery holds 600 souls of Moxxie's money, with Moxxie himself glaring at him with seething anger.

"Wow! Man, you're really starting to make this sad. Y'know, if you suck, you suck! Guess you won't win your honey here a prize..."

"Let me try!" Millie grabs the pistol and fires a cork at a target, which misses wildly. The carnie Imp grins mischievously, and presses a foot pedal in the booth, which causes a target to fall down.

"Ohhhh, look at that! Lucky shot, baby." He says leering over to her with a 'flirting' gaze.

"Are you kidding me?! You- you- you charlatan!" He begins to yell only to be shoved away.

"Hey, uh, get lost, pipsqueak. I'm talkin' to the lady~"

The carnie Imp leans toward Millie and makes a seductive purring sound at her. Millie immediately recoils in disgust. In the background, Blitz and Robo Fizz continue to do battle against each other as the fires spread. Blitzo is thrown up into the air by Robo Fizz and comes down through the roof of the shooting gallery, crushing the carnie Imp under him.

"OWWWW! Oof! Auuugh!"

"Sir?!" Moxxie yelled in shock at seeing his boss land on the carnie but was overall grateful he did.

"Ohhhh...Hey, guys!" He speaks slightly dazed from the impact. "You should probably go, uh, make sure Stolas is okay. I've... got some unfinished business to take care of."

Getting the message Moxxie quickly grabs Millie's hand and runs away. Not before making sure to grab a few of the plushies before they get destroyed. He worked hard to try and get those for Millie and the kids and he'd be damned if he didn't get them.

Blitz draws his flintlock pistol, co*cks it, and fires at the now burning Robo Fizz. The impact of the bullet spins Robo Fizz's head around, but when he spins his head back, he is revealed to be unharmed by the shot, having caught the bullet in his teeth. He then spits the bullet out.

"Oh, what a mouth!"

Blitzo immediately grimaces when he realizes what he just said. Robo Fizz coils himself up into his rolling form again, charging straight at Blitzo. He leaps out of the way as his enemy hits the booth, destroying it in a large explosion. Several pieces of shrapnel and burning prizes shoot in all directions, as the camera follows the severed heads of three of the "things" Moxxie attempted to win. The piece of stuffed animal strikes a young Imp boy in the head, knocking him unconscious the second a photographer takes a picture of the Imp family.

"Goddammit, Nathan! You ruined another bloody photo! Why were you even born?!" The father yelled in anger. Karma soon hit as a large piece of debris from one of the rides fell on him. Essentially crushing him.

Elsewhere, Stolas is still running after his daughter. Izuku was running along with him and doing his best to make sure the fires didn't spread as quickly. He soon saw the girl they were looking for in the distance.

"Octavia?" Stolas called out for her.

"Just leave me alone!"

"Octavia!"

Octavia runs into a building called the "Fun House." Inside, Stolas is confronted with a surreal room of eyes, tubes, spikes, mirrors, and disembodied hands. He goes further into the room, looking around for where his daughter could have gone. A shadow appears behind Stolas, as a random Imp jumps upon his back.

"Umm, I think I'm supposed to be bodyguarded right now!" The Imp covers Stolas' mouth with his shirt sleeve, but is suddenly shot in the head and falls to the ground. Moxxie and Millie appear in the entryway, Millie having just shot the Imp with a pistol.

"Hey you two. You guys have fun?" Izuku asked with mild amusem*nt as the two imps slid down the stairs.

"We had plenty, hun. We even got some prizes for the girls." Millie said as she snuggled one of the Things.

"Where is Blitzy? He's my knight in shining armor, not you littler ones." Stolas questions mildly annoyed.

"He's, uhhhh... busy." Millie says awkwardly, not sure how to describe the situation.

"Being a fool." Moxxie states while carrying a sack filled with the plushies he stole.

"What kind of fool?"

"The "Everything is now on fire" kind."

"So just typical Blitz. Got it." Izuku says as he goes deeper into the fun house with Stolas following behind him.

They leave through a tunnel into an adjacent room where Izuku sees Octavia riding in circles in apple-themed rail cars, crying into her arms. Stolas notices her and tries to go over to her, only to be stopped by Izuku.

"Let me talk to her really quickly. I think I can at least help her out a bit." He says, getting a nod from the owl demon.

"Octavia..." Izuku speaks as he approaches the ride.

"Just go away!" She yells at him, continuing to cry as she did so.

He ignored her wishes and took a seat beside her. Sitting in slight awkwardness for a few seconds before he placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. She takes her face out of her arms and looks at him, expecting him to start talking to her.

"I don't really have the greatest relationship with my dad." He says simply slightly surprising her. "It's not that he doesn't try, it's just tough to accept him in my life when he wasn't in it for so long. Especially with all the trouble I've caused him."

"W-what happened?" She asked, wiping away at her tears.

"It's just, my parents were never really married or were even a couple for that long. After they broke off they didn't stay in contact." He started explaining. "I spent nearly two decades of my life without a father and when we met for the first time I wasn't sure what to do. He sure as hell wasn't sure either."

"What are you trying to say? That I'd be better off without him?" She grumbled not trying to understand where he was getting at.

"No. It's just I think you're lucky growing up with him as a parent. Its clear that he really loves you. He just wanted to spend time with you seeing how you used to love it here."

"Yeah, before my parents hated each other. And my dad didn't flirt with some red asshole the whole time!" Octavia's tears begin flowing again as she starts crying again.

Suddenly she gets a feeling around her. Lifting her gaze she find Izuku hugging her gently. Stroking her feathers in an attempt to comfort her. Easing herself into the hold she continues to cry.

"Parents aren't perfect and sometimes they make mistakes." He says to her as he holds her close. "But he's trying, isn't he? Just take a chance to talk it out with him."

"B-but how can I talk to him? He doesn't listen. He didn't listen to me about coming here and won't listen now."

"He will if you just give him the chance." He says, gesturing over to Stolas who is peeking over to them. "So talk it out right now. I got a fire to put out outside." He sighs as he lets her go. "Don't mess up this chance Stolas."

Stolas nods to him before he leaves the room. He sits next to his daughter for a moment. Trying to figure out what to say.

"I take it you are... not having fun."

"I didn't even want to come here!" She yells through her tears.

"I'm sorry, sweetie. I... I thought you loved it here."

"When I was a kid and my parents didn't hate each other... and my dad didn't flirt with some... weird red dickhe*d the entire time."

"I'm sorry, Via. I'm sorry for... everything... happening right now. I know it's... a lot. I, uh-- I should have listened."

"I just want to go home... but home doesn't even feel like home anymore... You ruined it."

"You need to understand... your mother and I... I just-... I felt-... She's always been... I haven't been- Ha-... We weren't in... I'm sorry, I- I- I don't have the words." He stuttered over himself

"Are you gonna run off with him? And leave me behind? Go away where... I can't find you?" She asked through tears,

"What? No! No, no, never. I'd never do that. Never." He quickly rushed over to her and wrapped her in a hug. She smiled under the warm embrace as he picked her up in his arms. "I think it's time to leave this place. You were right. You are too old for it, anyway."

Stolas carries Octavia out of the Fun House, as an imp grins maniacally in the space above the drop-ceiling, looking down on Stolas. The imp drops down and flicks open a switchblade. Stolas immediately turns around, eyes glowing brightly. The Imp immediately turns to stone and is knocked over by a pendulum.

"Hi Ho! Silver!" Izuku yells from atop the dragon with Moxxie one his shoulder firing off several rounds at the Robo Fizz.

Millie is dashing around trying to shoot the robot but he dogges them as he rolls around wildly. It is however short lived as the robot is caught by the draconic creature from before, and is swallowed whole. Stolas and Octavia leave the park strolling past all the action not really caring for it.

"So, what would you like to do now?"

"Oh, can we go to Stylish Occult? They sell weird taxidermy there."

"Hmmm, okayyyyy..." He reluctantly agrees, getting a small laugh from her.

"Thanks, dad. You're okay, sometimes."

"Thank you, Via. Thank you." He hugs her closer as a massive explosion rocks what's left of the park.

Sending the employees of I.M.P. hurtling through the air, smoking and screaming. Izuku spreads his wings and catches Moxxie and Millie before they could hit the ground. Unfortunately he couldn't get Blitz in time so he crashed onto the ground in front of Stolas and Octavia. Izuku landed safely shortly after.

"Our sweet hero!~" Millie says as she kisses Izuku on the lips for a few seconds. "I'd wager you've earned something special later~"

"Calm down Mills." Izuku chuckles as he gives her one more kiss before setting them down.

"Way to ruin another good thing, sir!" Moxxie complained as he watched him crawl on the ground.

"Worth it! That slu*tty toy clown had. It. Comin'!" Blitz falls unconscious as a stray Quieve strolls over and begins to drag him away.

"He'll be fine." Izuku says as they watch the Quieve drag him back not even a second later. Taking a quick piss on him before running away.

"Welp I guess we better get you two home then." He refocuses on Stolas and Octavia.

"Actually if you would be so kind as to instead drop us off at this 'Stylish Occult' business. Via would like to check out the taxidermy there."

"Oh sure, that won't be an issue. I can take you guys over." Izuku says as he picks Blitz by the tail and tosses him in the van.

"Yeah, we should be all good for the rest of the day." Millie said as she loaded up into the passenger side.

"Well I'll be seeing you guys tomorrow then." Izuku peers over to the driver's side where Mox had sat. "Drive safely and call if you need me. Later boo~" He kissed his cheek, making him blush.

"Must you be such a flirt at times like this."

"Aw~ You know you love it, Sweetie~" He winks at them before they start driving off. "Anyway, let's load up!"

"I call shotgun!" Octavia says excitedly as Izuku opens the passenger door for her.

Stolas looked at this with a small smile. Knowing that he had made a good decision. Now all he had to worry about was bringing it up with his daughter when the time was right. He scowled at the thought of how little time he has left to keep her from having to live through what he has but hopes it will turn out well.

"Hey dad!" Octavia's voice cut his thoughts short. "You coming?"

"Yes! Yes! I'm coming my Owlet!" He smiled happily as he should focus on spending time with his daughter.

~To Be Continued~

Also something pretty important I guess:

This ship that I didn't even know was a thing but it was in the new episode "Apology Tour" and while I saw it pretty much trending on Tiktok I got to thinking of scenarios for how it came to be. So here's this scene that I wrote knowing full well that some people were gonna ask me about it.

"So....." Izuku grumbled as he pinched the bridge of his nose. "It might be because I've been gone for a few days but could someone please explain.....This!" He yelled pointedly as he stared at two individuals who sat on the couch in the hotel lobby.

These two individuals were none other than Mara Mayberry, who was currently looking down slightly ashamed. Her face held a massive blush as she fidgeted in place. The other, surprisingly, was Martha. The southern belle that Mayberry had hired I.M.P. to kill months ago. The blonde shared the former's nervousness and slight embarrassment. Though that had more to do with the only clothing she was wearing at this moment was one of the hotel bathrobes. And I mean the ONLY thing she was wearing.

"I don't know." Mayberry finally spoke up, not even looking him in the eye. "It all happened so fast! One moment I was having drinks with a friend then I saw her! I was seeing red!"

"It was hot." Martha said with a lustful smirk.

"The next thing I knew we were wrestling in an alley! She tore my clothes off and I tore her's! We hit somebody then there was red smoke everywhere!" Mayberry continued her best to explain but her embarrassment overwhelmed her as she shrunk into her seat.

"I'll continue then." Marth licked her lips with a smirk that made Izuku slightly uneasy. "She latched her lips onto me and we started making out like mad. Then she grabbed two handfuls of my tit*!" She emphasized by grabbing her boobs, nearing popping out of her robe. "She dragged me halfway down the city before we got here. She threw me on her bed and ate me like a ravenous beast! So I flipped her over and did the same!" In her excitement she spread her legs, revealing her shaved puss* for all to see.

"STOP!!!!" Mayberry yelled out as she hid behind her arms. "He doesn't need to know that!"

"I think he does! After all it was HIS name you started screaming, Darlin'~"

"Please skip to the end." Izuku sighed as he tried to avoid looking down at Martha's.....yeah.

"Like you don't want to know what we did~ I bet you'd just love a full performance of it~" She smirked, running her hand down her exposed form.

"I will neither confirm or deny that." He blushed looking away from the scene, hoping that the women could see his growing erection.

"And then I woke up with this sexy little tramp stamp and then you saw me trying to sneak out bare ass naked~" She said, exposing her slim abdomen and showing off a mark that bore a resemblance to Mayberry's horns with a heart.

"Well you guys entered a soul deal." Izuku surmised as he and Mayberry continued to look over the exposed areas of her body. "So yeah now you own her now. Good luck."

"Well this will be fun~" Martha slid her way toward Mayberry, completely shedding her robe. "Won't it,mistress?~"

"P-please n-not in front of him..." She whispered, her voice trembling. As were her legs.

"Why not? I'm certain the big boy over there would love to have two sexy little bitches to play with~" Marth shook her ass towards Izuku as she snuck her hand up Mayberry's skirt. "Ain't that right,Master?~"

"I think you all know where this is going." Izuku said as he looked over at the readers before covering the camera with his hand.

A Helluva Time - Diablo_D_Drago (2024)

Chapter 1

Chapter Text

Chapter 2: Hazbin Hotel Pilot

Chapter Text

Chapter 3: Family Comes

Chapter Text

Chapter 4: Helluva Boss Pilot

Chapter Text

Chapter 5: ~Murder Family~

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Chapter 6: The New Guest

Chapter Text

Chapter 7: ~Loo Loo Land~

Chapter Text